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The Parts of The Soul: A Greek System of Chakras, by John Opsopaus 7

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Once upon a time. . . .

. . . . I first spurred interest in T.O.P.Y. with the listening of
Dreams Less Sweet. After I proceeded to lose that tape to a young lady,
I decided to find out more about the sound and reasons of T.O.P.Y. I
purchased the live records series, which has proven to be a source of
great enjoyment. And I try to forward the ideas of T.O.P.Y. with
messages on the dorm door, and I try to play a few songs when I dj at
the campus radio station.

What I rather liked about T.O.P.Y. was that there was no forcing of
ideals on myself the listener. There are, I will not hold back, a few
ideals I do not in self practice, because they do not appeal to me, but
I will not condescend because someone else may. For the book, I do not
experiment with drugs, have sex, or denounce strongly non-pagan
religions. Persons may say that I have not lived, but that is someone
else's idea of living. If and when I wish to try something, I shall, but
until then I am content with myself. I guess the point is that it is a
choice, and one must not necessarily make certain choices to be involved
with T.O.P.Y.

The problem, well wait. Let us stay with that prior thought, about
choices, just for a minute. You may have noticed I don't spell certain
words the way T.O.P.Y. does; again I do not feel that is important for
me to reflect that thought to be considered involved with T.O.P.Y.
Anyway, as I was writing, the problem is I am afraid that I may not be
able to be as active as I wish in T.O.P.Y. with my schooling, because
education is very important to me. So, what I guess I am getting at, is
that I will do my best to do what I can. I can only hope that does not
sound too "wishy-washy". So, I am, will, try to do my most.

How would I explain T.O.P.Y. to a stranger? Simply, a group, tribe of
persons who are looking ahead, with little recourse to beliefs or
principles that have been embedded, sometimes unwillingly, into society.
An aim of reversal, getting people to quit taking for granted what
surrounds them, and having them realize they have control of their life,
and to use themselves to their potential.

Why do I feel T.O.P.Y. is important? Because it serves as a meeting
center for those persons who already know what they feel to get stronger
centralisation and organisation, and make themselves and their ideas
more available to others. It's got a lot to do with the concept of
awareness.

I guess aims and ideas have been taken care of. Sexuality, again, is an
awareness, realizing how present it is, and how it can be made into
something more wonderful than expected or known.

The Psychick Cross has so much behind it that it is rather hard to sum
up its meaning, besides representing a receptor for thought processes.
Also, I just rather thought that it could also be seen as a christian
cross overlapped by a satanic (inverted christian) cross, and a bar in
the middle to cancel the two out, which would go along with the theory
of bowing to no god.

23 is something I cannot comment too intelligently on, since I have not
the amount of information necessary. I have heard, however, that it is
the number of confusion, and actually, I myself have not much more of a
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view on it. . .yet.

Other resources of my self-determination, defining ideas clearly,
patience, art skills (with both pen and words), and desire to communi-
cate.

---------------------------------------------

Explanation of T.O.P.Y. to a Stranger:

I found this question difficult to answer as I do not know enough about
T.O.P.Y. People have asked me what it is, so I told them that it is an
information network and to contact T.O.P.Y. if interested. However, when
pressured I inform them of as much as I can, expanding on the ideas that
I know, and state that thee network runs all over thee country and that
depending on an individuals involvement information is available to
them; that it is up to thee individual, if they want, to becoum involved
and that one is not pressured into it.

To justify my involvement I would say that T.O.P.Y. has thee same or
similar beliefs to those I have always held, but from which I had
switched off as it was not "right" in thee conditioned world.

---------------------------------------------

On T.O.P.Y.

I have played PTV &/or T.O.P.Y. material for many friends, so I am often
asked about T.O.P.Y.

I tailor the answer to the questioner, telling no more than I think they
can follow at the time. Sometimes I describe PTV as a loose aggregate of
people working with music and video. I may explain that they are part of
a larger organisation which seeks to support people whose aims and
interests are outside the mainstream.

To people I trust I explain more. That T.O.P.Y. is a network of people
with some similarities and some differences, held together by a desire
to understand and short-circuit control. To explore ways to make what
they want to happen, happen. That T.O.P.Y. encourages people to find out
their true natures, not a shallow and generic, dictated and advertised
"identity".

One method is to exploit the cut-up, both on other material and
behaviourally as well. We constantly run on habit, and it is good to
break this up. Do you see friend X because you really want to? Or
because it's what you always do on Thursday night? A simple but
pertinent example.

Burroughs has been quoted as saying there was nothing special about 23,
just that it was something he noticed and then kept noticing. I see it
partly as a symbol of focus. That there is so much around that we screen
out daily, if we pick something not to screen out it will seem om-
nipresent. I also like the idea of it as a sort of mischievous number,
popping up with a will of its own where it has no statistical right. And
each time it pops up itself it reminds me of my psychic heritage that I
am reclaiming for myself.

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I see no particular sexual style that is representative of T.O.P.Y. It
is more an aspect of sex itself, that of the power (indeed - OV Power)
it contains. A power that can be frustrated by a denial of desire;
dissipated by investing it in removed, marketed images; or directed by
self-understanding and a ritual method. Since the sex drive is so basic,
and since social repression functions here as much or more than anywhere
else, sexual magick is a most powerful and empowering technique.

The particular interpretations of 23 and the Psychick Cross are not as
interesting or important to me as the fact that there are many
interpretations.

If a cynic - journalist or otherwise - is asking me about T.O.P.Y., I
believe it is important not to try too much to defend or to try to
convince the person that there's nothing horrid about us. I will,
however, try to dispel any basic misconceptions. I have found that so
much of what I take for granted is alien to many people that I cannot
explain parts of it. As I've noted, it took me a while to understand so
many foreign thoughts at once. If pressed by anyone who is obviously
hostile to and/or threatened by the ideas, I say "Well, I'm convinced of
it, it works for me, and I'm happy." I do not try to "convert"
them. If they are unaccepting of it, I give them some things to read,
and T.O.P.Y.'s address.

 ---------------------------------------------

T.O.P.Y. is an international network system, a kind of organisation that
brings in touch people who share ideas and feel free to do whatever they
like, as strange as it may be. That's the reason why T.O.P.Y. is
important. In times of loneliness, T.O.P.Y. tries to bring people in
touch, tries to bring back the lost innocence, the correspondence among
people. T.O.P.Y. hates everything and everyone who tries to limit its
freedom. T.O.P.Y. offers a method of living to better survive as a True
Being, and as an Individual, and not as part of the maze. Individuality
is expressed as Spirit and Will. "Love Under Will" is the meaning. To
manage it, T.O.P.Y. edits books, records, video tapes. T.O.P.Y. requires
belief in Magick and modern Paganism, and recognises the power of the
human brain.

The Psychick Cross means to me: Brain (upper bar); Heart (middle bar);
Prick - as the home of souls (lower bar). It means the Individual
itself, with its three psychic powers: Brain = dreams, fantasy,
cleverness; Heart = L.OV.E.; Prick = soul = the power that motivates all
the above.

The meaning of 23 is a mystic one, and people can only understand it
after long thought about T.O.P.Y.

---------------------------------------------

T.O.P.Y. is very important to thee continued growth of psychic awareness
in thee world. We have progressed physically as far as we can. Thee next
stage is mental.

T.O.P.Y. offers a series of mental training exercises: awareness
(especially ov yourself) is thee goal.

There is no obligation, as thee Temple is you.  Thee aims are immense.
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Education, realisation, principally.  Thee Temple can be anything you
need from it.  23 is thee pure number, completely random, a prime
number.  Thee Cross: a reflection of thee ego, a place to focus energy
and a simple, comfortable symbol representing a new strength in thee
world.

---------------------------------------------

Thee Justification ov T.O.P.Y.

Last night me and some members ov T.O.P.Y.S.T.E.E.L engaged thee "JESUS
ARMY" in verbal confrontation. It was in some ways an awakening
experience. It was also an experience which demonstrates thee necessity
for T.O.P.Y., PaganLink, O.T.O., etc.

To be confronted with thee organised inculcation of GUILT, FEAR and
LOATHING in militaristic form demonstrated the need for L.O.V.E.
organisations to provide the keys to self-(de)-programming.

To be confronted with INTOLERANCE and PSYCHIC VAMPIRISM showed the
horrible fate awaiting us if our society/thee earth is taken over by
thee forces of PERSONAL LIMITATION.

T.O.P.Y. provides a decentralised set of forums for individuals who wish
to escape our conditioned guilt and fear responses. It provides outline
methods for individuals who wish to acquire self expression, self love,
self discipline.

T.O.P.Y. is a will/energy focus. It's LOVE transmitting on all frequen-
cies.  True sexuality is a timeless moment of orgone mutation, thee
event where thee subconscious becomes all thee planes, thee times, where
it becomes an identity with thee conscious worlds. Liberation is only a
heartbeat away.

Thee Psychick Cross = pagan Cross. Sexual unions. Tree of Life,
qabballahs.  Thee planes, all in one. Thee sigil of Temple workings,
immanent in this cross, every working ever done before or in thee
future, happening now.  Thee sigil ov no name, thee blank sheet for our
experiences and desires to write upon.

23: No-one has ever satisfactorily explained to me how or why a computer
works. But I use one almost every day, and computers always touch my
life.  Similarly, 23 has not been totally explained to me, even in
numerological terms. Not fully anyway. Thee fact remains that 23 seems
to have some kind ov recurrent activity, in my experience. That does not
mean it will necessarilty be a feature of your experienced universe...

23 attaches itself in its various guises (32, 223, 123, 0-23, etc.) to
things I j- and many other YOUTH - are involved with. 23 seems to be a
sign of recurrent activity in thee universe, ov unifying themes.

---------------------------------------------

Justification of T.O.P.Y. to a cynical interviewer:

As rationality has failed to create a new mankind there are other
methods to be found of changing minds. The will must come from in-
dividuals, who, to reach their aims, gather in a group.
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Through the moral conditioning in childhood, school, military and the
general influence of language, media and moral systems, men are totally
controlled.  They control each other, oftenj without even knowing it.
The wishes, dreams of the body and subconsciousness are ignored and the
subject, so long as there is one, is conditioned to ignore it too. Only
functionality is important.

Life is shortened to operational functions to serve society. It is
degraded to a servant. As I feel unsatisfied by this, I need to escape
from this control and want to destroy it. I like to experiment with
other aspects of life. In this case, sexuality is an important factor
because it gives the individual a total conscience of its own existence.
It may help to find the inner self and break pre-formations. I like
sexuality. In orgasm, you cross the border. In orgasm you die. Your
coming back from another cone of reality after it. The coming to climax
is a way to ego-destruction.

---------------------------------------------

People are suppressed and conditioned by the socialisation processes of
our "society" - education, media, and the family - to believe in certain
attitudes and to behave in certain ways.

What has happened to individuality and the personality?

People should be taught to develop their own-selves and their own
personalities - To learn about instinct, nature, consciousness and
further heights of awareness, WHICH HAVE NEVER BEEN PUSHED FROM OUR
MINDS.

The human mind is suppressed not to generate its "unacceptable" powers.

Meditation, creative visualisation, and MAGICK are important tools which
may be used to help bring out our true selves.

Sexuality is condemned from an early age. Society as a whole condemns
sexuality.

It is a beautiful experience - and can prove to be a very powerful and
magickal act - generating immense emotion and feeling.

The idea of PLEASURE AND PAIN is fundamental to the understanding and
experiences of people. Sex can exist within both concepts.

People should learn not to be ashamed of their sexuality, and sexually,
to share experiences with other individuals.

UNDERSTANDING, DEVELOPMENT, AND COMMUNICATION.

OUR AIM IS WAKEFULNESS.
OUR ENEMY IS DREAMLESS SLEEP

---------------------------------------------

Involvement with T.O.P.Y. means that I have broken away from the social
graces forced upon me by society. I am finding out what I really enjoy
to do, with my mental/physical attributes. I am learning to reach
further than before, to grasp the things that were previously beyond my
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reach.

T.O.P.Y. is a collective of individuals who, in a way, do not want to be
part of any group/social type. This is not as hypocritical as it sounds,
because each individual within T.O.P.Y. is going his/her own way, each
with differing goals, concepts of life.

T.O.P.Y. is important because it gives the individuals within a
confidence that others are trying to struggle against society. T.O.P.Y.
members feel as though they are not the only ones with a different point
of view. It gives the individual strength to succeed.

T.O.P.Y.'s aim is to help individuals attain their highest dreams, and
to help them accomplish their works and wishes in life.

---------------------------------------------

T.O.P.Y. allows thee individual a chance to know him/her self. I am not
sure if I would be able to explain T.O.P.Y. to a stranger. Recently I
was talking to a friend who told me she no longer wanted to be my friend
because I was involving myself with T.O.P.Y. She does not believe in
anything. Her point is that I would no longer be me and that I didn't
need T.O.P.Y.'s ideas to help me with my problems, that in time
everything works out in itself.

I disagreed with her argument, trying to explain that T.O.P.Y. would
help me with the goals that I want to obtain in my life, and that in the
past not all my problems have worked out by themself.

T.O.P.Y. asks for the individual to be clear in admitting their real
desires by discarding all irrelevancies and by asking yourself what do
you really want out ov life. The argument with my friend allowed me to
see that we were no longer friends and perhaps we never really were. How
could we have been friends when she would not allow me to be anymore
than I already was nor anything else that I could be.

T.O.P.Y. is not there to be occult. But a lot ov people have that
misunderstanding. People will always condemn the thoughts and actions ov
another.

There is someone who I am deeply interested in, who spoke ov tribal
living and the ideas ov T.O.P.Y. At that time I had no idea what he was
talking about and the shyness that we both have makes it almost
impossible to talk to each other. We are barely able to smile and say
hello, and I believe thru the Psychick process we will be able to speak
again. I will overcome the shyness that keeps me within myself and keeps
me from having what I really want from life.

T.O.P.Y.'s ideas are for everyone who wants to wake up fromthe dreamless
world that we are living in. It's for the individual who asks themself
what they want from life, and the rituals are there to make those
thoughts happen.

"Awareness ov your own energy is the awareness that flesh and spirit are
one, that thou art goddess, eternally linked, connected, at one with the
moving spirit ov all" (Starhawk 138)

T.O.P.Y. is there for thee individual who makes the coumitment to become
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aware ov thee energy that is inside us all. . .

---------------------------------------------

Magic has interested me from an early age - but I didn't have the best
informed beginning. I used to try telekinesis, telepathy, astral
projection,even levitation, all with varying degree of complete failure.
I had no concentration or confidence, and a very impatient streak. The
things I tried to do were very nice "tricks" but many of them are no
longer goals of mine. I see no reason now to attempt things for which I
had little aptitude, solely to impress others and build up my own social
standing. People are so cynical now, and maybe some of it has rubbed off
on me.

The Temple has shown me a practical side to magick which makes no
pretensions, I don't expect to be able to force the hand of chance with
minimum effort and concentration and nothing to inform me but a
half-read Aquarian Press book. In my future sigil work I shall aim to
overcome some of my less attractive tendencies, and build on my natural
talents and abilities. My ideal target will be a perfect self and not a
material manipulator. Maybe people should expect miracles because I
think if you believe in something enough then you are halfway to having
it, just as long as it's within and not without yourself.

I don't feel that I need to justify my involvement with anything, to
anyone.  People have an instant dislike and fear of things they don't
understand, but worse than this, an aversion to information which could
disrupt their secure, boring, featureless lives. To me, many of these
people are lost causes, I would prefer that they knew nothing of what I
choose to do with my life - which is too precious to spend arguing with
people who will never see sense for the simple reason that they don't
want to. This may seem a selfish attitude, but the example of Susan
Bishop is enough to put me off talking to journalists, and Christians,
for life. Let them remain ignorant and happy, they will never change.

---------------------------------------------

People like to control you. They want power and they achieve it. These
thieves are smart and they work off people's insecurities. CONTROL means
dictating how others should live and how to think. If you are afraid of
making these decisions for yourself (because of fear of failure, lack of
self-confidence, fear of death, and definitely laziness) then it is easy
to associate yourself with, and follow someone strong enough to make
decisions for you.  You are no longer responsible for yourself and no
longer have the burden or that responsibility. It is easier to identify
oneself with an already developed personality (hero/heroine) than go
through the never ending struggle of self-discovery. The insecure
robbers who feed off our weaknesses are the ones most people tend to
trust: our rabbis and priests who control through strict regulations and
traditions, our school teachers who take advantage of
the innocence and naivety of young children by presenting themselves and
their ideas as manifestations of god, and our media which depicts THE
acceptable lifestyle through slanted manipulations. These thieves are
aware of your trust and innocence, and intend on using those weaknesses
to control you.

The Temple Ov Psychick Youth is an organisation aimed at DE-control.
They do not wish to control you; they wish to liberate themselves. They
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offer suggestions on how you COULD liberate yourself, not how you SHOULD
liberate yourself. The process of liberation consists of many types of
research, such as the music group PTV. Members of the Temple feel that
there is no reason why life should not be "lived to the fullest" where
all one's NEEDS and DESIRES are fulfilled. Because there are so many
distractions to divert one's attention from one's goals, symbols are
invented to be worn, to be drawn, etc., to constantly remind, if not the
conscious, then the unconscious, of these goals. Ideally, through this
process laziness is combatted and the goals will more likely be achieved
since those goals are constantly on the person's mind. Because there are
so many distractions and limitations posed by the "controllers",
sometimes our deepest wants do not seem earthly possible, and we repress
them in our subconscious (a step towards neurosis) trying to dismiss
them. The Temple does not believe in repressing our needs and desires
(submitting to those "controllers"), because our personal needs are what
make us human and individual.

The Psychick Cross is the symbol of the "whole" person, uncovering one's
unconsciously hidden desires and obtaining them. The unconscious speaks
most loudly in our dreams and our fantasies. When we fantasize, our
desires usually take place in Utopian settings, and represent these
goals by creating collages including parts of our physical body to
personalise the symbol of our goal even more. This symbol reminds us
over and over again that this is thee want, this is thee self. Temple
members using this process end up understanding their needs and desires
better, are more able to satisfy themselves and succeed in life.

I personally enjoy making decisions and discoveries on my own. I will
not allow anyone to take that joy away from me. I enjoy my intelligence,
my talents, and discovering myself using the symbolic rituals suggested
by the Temple Ov Psychick Youth. T.O.P.Y. is an important organisation
because: 1) it shows people they are not alone in the struggle, and 2)
it allows people to exchange views, ideas, and solutions to better these
processes to liberate and satiate the individual self.
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                          "What is Paganism" 

----------------------------------------------------------------------
The following is the text from a brochure that BAPA puts out called
"What is Paganism" (author unknown)
------------------------------------------------------------------------

"WHAT IS PAGANISM?

"History of Paganism
 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"The term Pagan has numerous common definitions.  Many dictionaries
define a Pagan as anyone not of the Judeo-Islamic-Christian religions.
Some people consider anyone who does not share their religion to be a
Pagan.  Still others believe that a Pagan is a person who is
anti-religion.  None of these "definitions" manage to capture the true
meaning of the term.

"To discover the core meaning of Pagan, we look back to ancient times
when the word Pagan referred to a person of the country, or a peasant.

{deletia... in summary, several paragraphs relating the history of the
Catholic Church and the poor peasants' inability to relate.  Brief
description of the "glory of the Goddess and God in each starry night"
and note of the inconsistancies of the original Pagan beliefs with the
Catholic church.  Also, several paragraphs detailing the development of
of the Church's campaign to expunge Paganism, some of the methods
employed and the subsequent Witch Hunts.  Finally, an overall summary of
the persecution.  If interested, let me know and I'll post it
separately.}

"Paganism in Modern Times
 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Today, little is known about the Pagans who survived what is now often
called "The Burning Times."  Paganism, as it exists today, is best
described as the practice of any of a number of nature-based religions,
traditions that find their roots all over the world.  {Liana- sound
familiar?} Many modern Pagans call themselves "Neo-Pagans" to declare
their religion as a revival of the old beliefs.

{more deletia... in summary, two paragraphs comparing contemporary
Pagans to the peasants of old, extolling our intelligence and
involvement in technology.  Also a paragraph defusing the Satanism
comparison.  Again, if interested, let me know and I'll post it.}

"What do Modern Pagans Believe?
 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Paganism is actually a large umbrella containing a number of
nature-based religions beneath it, from the European-originated Wicca
and Druidism, to African Yoruba traditions and Hawaiian Huna.  As a
result of this diversity, it is impossible to make statements about the
beliefs of Pagans that will apply to *all* {italics} Pagans.  However,
some statements can be made that will, in general, apply to a vast
number of Pagans.

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"Many Pagans tend to:

"* Be polytheists, believing in more than one deity or more than
   one aspect of a single deity.

"* Be pantheists, seeing the God/Goddess force represented in everything
   around them.

"* Recognize the divinity of the feminine as well as the masculine, not
   seeing masculinity as a superior force.

"* Believe that the life force is sacred, and that nature, as a vital
   representation of that force, is divine.

"* Believe that all life forms are equal, sharing an equal claim to the
   earth as a home.

"* Believe that each individual is solely responsible for his or her
   actions.

"* Believe that the forces of nature can be shaped in ways commonly
   called "magical."

"* Believe that magical acts designed to bend one to another's will are
   manipulative, and not encouraged.

"* Believe that whatever actions a person takes, magical or mundane,
   good or bad, come back to him/her, sometimes threefold.

"* Believe that there is no single path to spiritual fulfillment, and
   that the individual must determine the spiritual expression most
   appropriate to him or her.

"* Believe in reincarnation, or some form of life after death.

"How do Pagans Practice Their Religion?
 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Many Pagans find spiritual expression through the practice of ritual,
or religious ceremony.  These rituals, often held at significant points
in lunar or solar cycles, offer an opportunity for Pagans to commune
with the godeesses and Gods, to celebrate the passages of life, and to
work magic.

{deletia... in summary, paragraphs relating techniques to "raise power"
explaining that we don't espouse "power over" (my words).  Also outlines
goals that many pagans have in mine when raising of power. Outlines the
sabbats, and relates the pattern of the seasons.  Briefly describes
Beltane and Samhain.  Once again, let me know if you would like to see
this text.}

"Each Pagan religion has its own special way of recognizing the passing
of the seasons and personal life passages.  Ritual offers a way to imbue
these moments with magic and reverence.

{deletia... last paragraph giving information on how the reader can
learn more about Paganism, specifically in the Bay Area, and relating
the goal that BAPA has in mind.}
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        PRINCIPIA DISCORDIA
       *  or  *
        How I Found Goddess
       And What I Did To Her
          When I Found Her

   THE MAGNUM OPIATE OF MALACLYPSE THE YOUNGER

        Wherein Is Explained
       Absolutely Everything Worth Knowing
     About Absolutely Anything


                                 Published By:
                             LOOMPANICS UNLIMITED
                                 PO BOX 1197
                           Port Townsend, WA 98368
                                 $5.00(cheap)
                                Catalogs:$2.00

Transcribed to 1's and 0's by Druel the Chaotic, WPI Discordian Society
                                                 Cabal of the Unemployed

                              mpython@gnu.ai.mit.edu

{calendar entered by /AHM/THX }

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 
                               INTRODUCTION

        You hold in your hands one the Great Books of our century fnord.
        
        Some Great Books are recognized at once with a fusilade of
critical huzzahs and gonfolons, like Joyce's ULYSSES. Others appear
almost furtively and are only discovered 50 years later, like MOBY DICK
or Mendel's great essay on genetics. The PRINCIPIA DISCORDIA entered our
space-time continuum almost as unobtrusively as a cat-burglar creeping
over a windowsill.

        In 1968, virtually nobody had heard of this wonderful book. In
1970,hundreds of people coast to coast were talking about it and asking
the identity of the mysterious author, Malaclypse the Younger. Rumors
swept across the continent, from New York to Los Angeles, from Seattle
to St. Joe. Malaclypse was actually Alan Watts, one heard. No,said
another legend -- the PRINCIPIA was actually the work of the Sufi Order.
A third, very intriguing myth held that Malaclypse was a pen-name for
Richard M. Nixon, who had allegedly composed the PRINCIPIA during a few
moments of lucidity. I enjoyed each of these yarns and did my part to
help spread them. I was also careful never to contradict the occasional
rumors that I had actually written the whole thing myself during an acid
trip.

        The legendry, the mystery, the cult grew slowly. By the
mid-1970's, thousands of people, some as far off as Hong Kong and
Australia, were talking about the PRINCIPIA, and since the original was
out of print by then, xerox copies were beginning to circulate here and
there.
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     When the ILLUMINATUS trilogy appeared in 1975, my co-author, Bob
Shea, and I both received hundreds of letters from people intrigued by
the quotes from the PRINCIPIA with which we had decorated the heads of
several chapters. Many, who had already heard of the PRINCIPIA or seen
copies, asked if Shea and I had written it, or if we had copies
available. Others wrote to ask if it were real, or just something we had
invented the way H.P. Lovecraft invented the NECRONOMICON. We answered
according to our moods, sometimes telling the truth, sometimes spreading
the most Godawful lies and myths we could devise fnord.

        Why not? We felt that this book was a true Classic (literatus
immortalis) and, since the alleged intelligentsia had not yet
discovered it, the best way to keep its legend alive was to encourage
the mythology and the controversy about it. Increasingly, people wrote
to ask  me if Timothy Leary had written it, and I almost always told
them he had, except on Fridays whem I am more whimsical, in which case
I told them it had been transmitted by a canine intellgence --
vast,cool,and unsympathic -- from the Dog Star, Sirius.

        Now, at last, the truth can be told.

     Actually, the PRINCIPIA is the work of a time-travelling
anthropologist from the 23rd Century. He is currently passing among us
as a computer specialist, bon vivant and philosopher named Gregory
Hill. He has also translated several volumes of Etruscan erotic
poetry, under another pen-name, and in the 18th Century was the
mysterious Man in Black who gave Jefferson the design for the Great
Seal of the United States.

     I have it on good authority that he is one of the most
accomplished time-travelers in the galaxy and has visited Earth many
times in the past,using such cover-identities as Zeno of Elias,
Emperor Norton, Count Cagliostro, Guilliame of Aquaitaine, etc.
Whenever I question him about this, he grows very evasive and attempts
to persuade me that he is actually just another 20th Century Earthman
and that all my ideas about his extraterrrestrial and extratemporal
origin and delusions. Hah! I am not that easily deceived. After all, a
time-travelling anthropologist would say just that, so that he could
observe us without his presense causing cultureshock.
     I understand that he has consented to write an Afterward to this
edition. He'll probably contradict everything I've told you, but don't
believe a word he says fnord. He is a master of the deadpan put-on, the
plausible satire, the philosophical leg-pull and all the branches of
guerilla ontology.

     For full benefit to the Head, this book should be read in conjunc-
tion with THE ILLUMINOIDS by Neal Wilgus (Sun Press, Albuquerque, NM)
and ZEN WITHOUT ZEN MASTERS by Camden Benares (And/Or Press, Berkeley,
California). "We are operating on many levels here", as Ken Kesey used
to say.

     In conclusion, there is no conclusion. Things go on as they always
have, getting weirder all the time.

        Hail Eris. All hail Discordia. Fnord?

        -Robert Anton Wilson
        International Arms and Hashish Inc.
2913

        Darra Bazar, Kohat

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~A jug of wine,
A leg of lamb
And thou!
Beside me,
Whistling in 
the darkness.


Be Ye Not Lost Among Precepts of Order...
  - The Book of Uterus 1;5


Some excerpts from an interview with Malaclypse the Younger by THE
GREATER METROPOLITAN YORBA LINDA HERALD-NEWS-SUN-TRIBUNE-JOURNAL-DISPAT-
CH-POST AND SAN FRANCISCO DISCORDIAN SOCIETY CABAL BULLETIN AND INTER-
GALACTIC REPORT & POPE POOP.

GREATER POOP:Are you really serious or what?
MAL-2: Sometimes I take humor seriously. Sometimes I take seriousness
humorously. Either way it is irrelevant.

GP: Maybe you are just crazy.
M2: Indeed! But do not reject these teaching as false because I am
crazy. The reason that I am crazy is because they are true.

GP: Is Eris true?
M2: Everything is true.
GP: Even false things?
M2: Even false things are true.
GP: How can that be?
M2: I don't know man, I didn't do it.

GP: Why do you deal with so many negatives?
M2: To dissolve them.
GP: Will you develop that point?
M2: No.

GP: Is there an essential meaning behind POEE?
M2: There is a Zen Story about a student who asked a Master to explain
the
meaning of Buddhism. The Master's reply was "Three pounds of flax."
GP: Is that the answer to my question?
M2: No, of course not. That is just illustrative. The answer to your
question
is FIVE TONS OF FLAX!


様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様
2914

                            SUSPENDED ANNIHILATION


                                                ODD# II/2,xii;68Chs3136

                         Principia Discordia
                                  or
               How I Found Goddess & What I Did To Her
                           When I found Her
                                   
                  being a Beginning Introduction to
                        The Erisian Mysterees
                                   
                      Which is Most Interesting
                                   
                                 -><-
                                   
                       as Divinely Revealed to
            My High Reverence MALACLYPSE THE YOUNGER, KSC
            Omnibenevolent Polyfather of Virginity in Gold
                          and HIGH PRIEST of
        THE PARATHEO-ANAMETAMYSTIKHOOD OF ERIS ESOTERIC (POEE)
                                   
                                   
          HAIL ERIS! -><- KALLISTI -><-  ALL HAIL DISCORDIA!
                                   
                    Dedicated to The Prettiest One
                                   
                   The Upstart of one hand clapping

                       - JOSHUA NORTON CABAL -
   Surrealists, Harlequinists, Absurdists and Zonked Artists Melee

POEE
is one manifestation of
THE DISCORDIAN SOCIETY
about which
you will learn more
and understand
less

We
are a tribe
of philosophers, theologians,
magicians, scientists,
artists, clowns,
and similar maniacs
who are intrigued
with
ERIS
GODDESS OF CONFUSION
and with
Her
Doings

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


2915

I Tell You: One must 
still have chaos in one
 to give birth to a
 dancing star! 
-Nietzsche

                THE FIVE COMMANDMENTS (THE PENTABARF)

The PENTABARF was discovered by the hermit Apostle Zarathud in the Fifth
Year of The Caterpillar. He found them carved in gilded stone, while
building a sun deck for his cave, but their import was lost for they
were written in a mysterious cypher. However, after 10 weeks & 11 hours
of intensive scrutiny he discerned that the message could be read by
standing on his head and viewing it upside down.

                         KNOW YE THIS O MAN OF FAITH!

I - There is no Goddess but Goddess and She is Your Goddess. There is no
Erisian Movement but The Erisian Movement and it is The Erisian
Movement. And every Golden Apple Corps is the beloved home of a Golden
Worm.

II - A Discordian Shall Always use the Official Discordian Document
Numbering System.

III - A Discordian is Required during his early Illumination to Go Off
Alone & Partake Joyously of a Hot Dog on a Friday; this Devotive
Ceremony to Remonstrate against the popular Paganisms of the Day: of
Catholic Christendom (no meat on Friday), of Judaism (no meat of Pork),
of Hindic Peoples (no meat of Beef), of Buddhists (no meat of animal),
and of Discordians (no Hot Dog Buns).

IV - A Discordian shall Partake of No Hot Dog Buns, for Such was the
Solace of Our Goddess when She was Confronted with The Original Snub.

V - A Discordian is Prohibited of Believing What he reads.

IT IS SO WRITTEN! SO BE IT. HAIL DISCORDIA! PROSECUTORS WILL BE
TRANSGRESSICUTED. 

Test Question from Topanga Cabal The Twelve Famous Buddha Minds School:
If they are our brothers, how come we can't eat them?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A ZEN STORY

by Camden Benares, The Count of Five
Headmaster, Camp Meeker Cabal

A serious young man found the conflicts of mid 20th Century America
confusing.  He went to many people seeking a way of resolving within
himself the discords that troubled him, but he remained troubled.  One
night in a coffee house, a self-ordained Zen Master said to him, "go to
the dilapidated mansion you will find at this address which I have
written down for you. Do not speak to those who live there; you must
remain silent until the moon rises tomorrow night. Go to the large room
on the right of the main hallway, sit in the lotus position on top of
2916

the rubble in the northeast corner, face the corner, and meditate."

     He did just as the Zen Master instructed. His meditation was fre-
quently interrupted by worries. He worried whether or not the rest of
the plumbing fixtures would fall from the second floor bathroom to join
the pipes and other trash he was sitting on. He worried how would he
know when the moon rose on the next night. He worried about what the
people who walked through the room said about him.

     His worrying and meditation were disturbed when, as if in a test of
his faith, ordure fell from the second floor onto him. At that time two
people walked into the room. The first asked the second who the man
was sitting there was. The second replied "Some say he is a holy man.
Others say he is a shithead."

     Hearing this, the man was enlightened.  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Western Union Telegram

To: Jehova Yahweh
Care: Celestial Hotel (Suite #666)
Presidential Tier, Paradise

Dear God;
This is to inform you that your current position as diety is herewith
terminated due to gross incompetence STOP  Your check will be mailed
STOP 
Please do not use me for a reference

        Respectfully,
                Malaclypse the Younger/Omnibenevolent Polyfather
                POEE High Priest

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

10. The Earth quakes and the heavens rattle; the beasts of nature flock
together and the nations of men flock apart; volcanoes usher up heat
while
elsewhere water becomes ice and melts; and then on other days it just
rains.
11. Indeed do many things come to pass.
        HBT; The Book of Predictions, Chap. 19

                   -  THE BIRTH OF THE ERISIAN MOVEMENT -
THE REVELATION

        Just prior to the decade of the nineteen-sixties, when Sputnik
was alone and new, and about the time that Ken Kesey took his first acid
trip as a medical volunteer; before underground newspapers, Viet Nam,
and talk of a second American Revolution; in the comparative quiet of
the late nineteen-fifties, just before the idea of RENAISSANCE became
relevant....

     Two young Californians, known later as Omar Ravenhurst and
Malaclypse the Younger, were indulging in their habit of sipping coffee
at an allnight bowling alley and generally solving the world's problems.
This particular evening the main subject of discussion was discord and
2917

they were complaining to each other of the personal confusion they felt
in their respective lives. "Solve the problem of discord," said one,
"and all other problems will vanish." "Indeed," said the other, "chaos
and strife are the roots of all confusion."


                         FIRST I MUST SPRINKLE YOU
                              WITH FAIRY DUST

Suddenly the place became devoid of light. Then an utter silence
enveloped them, and a great stillness was felt. Then came a blinding
flash of intense light, as though their very psyches had gone nova. Then
vision returned.

        The two were dazed and neither moved nor spoke for several
minutes.  They looked around and saw that the bowlers were frozen like
statues in a variety of comic positions, and that a bowling ball was
steadfastly anchored to the floor only inches from the pins that it had
been sent to scatter. The two looked at each other, totally unable to
account for the phenomenon. The condition was one of suspension, and one
noticed that the clock had stopped.


There walked into the room a chimpanzee, shaggy and grey about the
muzzle, yet upright to his full five feet, and poised with natural
majesty. He carried a scroll and walked to the young men.

"Gentlemen," he said, "why does Pickering's Moon go about in reverse
orbit?  Gentlemen, there are nipples on your chests; do you give milk?
And what, pray tell, Gentlemen, is to be done about Heisenberg's Law?"
He paused.  "SOMEBODY HAD TO PUT ALL OF THIS CONFUSION HERE!"

And with that he revealed his scroll. It was a diagram, like a yin-yang
with a pentagon on one side and an apple on the other. And then he
exploded and the two lost consciousness.

ERIS - GODDESS OF CHAOS, DISCORD & CONFUSION

        They awoke to the sound of pins clattering, and found the
bowlers engaged in their game and the waitress busy with making coffee.
It was apparant that their experience had been private.
        
        They discussed their strange encounter and reconstructed from
memory the chimpanzee's diagram. Over the next five days they searched
libraries to find the significance of it, but were disappointed to
uncover only references to Taoism, the Korean flag, and Technocracy. It
was not until they traced the Greek writing on the apple that they
discovered the ancient Goddess known to the Greeks as ERIS and to the
Romans as DISCORDIA. This was on the fifth night, and when they slept
that night each had a vivid dream of a splendid woman whose eyes were as
soft as feather and as deep as eternity itself, and whose body was the
spectacular dance of atoms and universes.  Pyrotechnics of pure energy
formed her flowing hair, and rainbows manifested and dissolved as she
spoke in a warm and gentle voice:

I have come to tell you that you are free. Many ages ago, My conscious-
ness left man, that he might develop himself. I return to find this
development approaching completion, but hindered by fear and by 
2918

misunderstanding.  You have built for yourselves psychic suits of armor,
and clad in them, your vision is restricted, your movements are clumsy
and painful, your skin is bruised, and your spirit is broiled in the
sun.  I am chaos. I am the substance from which your artists and
scientists build rhythms. I am the spirit with which your children and
clowns laugh in happy anarchy. I am chaos. I am alive, and I tell you
that you are free.

     During the next months they studied philosophies and theologies,
and learned that ERIS or DISCORDIA was primarily feared by the ancients
as being disruptive. Indeed, the very concept of chaos was still
considered equivalent to strife and treated as a negative. "No wonder
things are all screwed up," they concluded, "they have got it all
backwards." They found that the principle of disorder was every much as
significant as the principle of order.

        With this in mind, they studied the strange yin-yang. During a
meditation one afternoon, a voice came to them:

It is called THE SACRED CHAO. I appoint you Keepers of It. Therein you
will find anything you like. Speak of Me as DISCORD, to show contrast to
the pentagon. Tell constricted mankind that there are no rules, unless
they choose to invent rules. Keep close the words of Syadasti: 'TIS AN
ILL WIND THAT BLOWS NO MINDS. And remember that there is no tyranny in
the State of Confusion. For further information, consult your pineal
gland.

        "What is this?" mumbled one to the other, "A religion based on
The Goddess of Confusion? It is utter madness!"

     And with those words, each looked at the other in absolute awe.
Omar began to giggle. Mal began to laugh. Omar began to jump up and
down. Mal was hooting and hollering to beat all hell. And amid squeals
of mirth and with tears on their cheeks, each appointed the other to be
high priest of his own madness, and together they declared themselves to
be a society of Discordia, for what ever that may turn out to be.


"There are trivial truths & there are great truths. The opposite of a
trivial truth is plainly false. The opposite of a great truth is also
true."
                                        -Neils Bohr

"Did you know that there is a million bucks hidden in the house next
door?"
"But there is no house next door."
"No? Then let's go build one!"
                                        -MARX

Fnord Fnord, Fnord, Fnord, Fnord, Fnord, Fnord, Fnord, Fnord, Fnord,
Fnord, Fnord, Fnord,  Fnord, Fnord, Fnord, Fnord, Fnord, Fnord, Fnord,
Fnord, Fnord

Momomoto, Famous Japanese, can swallow his nose.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


2919

                            St. Trinian's
                      SUPPORT YOUR LOCAL POLICE
                            Sewing Circle




                  THE BATTLE HYMN OF THE ERISTOCRACY
                                     by Lord Omar

VERSE
Mine brain has meditated on the spinning of The Chao;
It is hovering o'er the table where the Chiefs of Staff are now
Gathered in discussion of the dropping of The Bomb;
Her Apple Corps is strong!

CHORUS
Grand (and gory) Old Discordja!
Grand (and gory) Old Discordja!
Grand (and gory) Old Discordja!
Her Apple Corps is strong!

VERSE
She was not invited to the party that they held on Limbo Peak;*
So She threw a Golden Apple, 'sted of turn'd t'other cheek!
O it cracked the Holy Punchbowl and it made the nectar leak;
Her Apple Corps is strong!


* "Limbo Peak" refers to Old Limbo Peak, commonly called by the Greeks
"Ol' Limb' Peak."


If a quixotic socrates studied zen under Zorba...?

"The tide is turning... the enemy is suffering terrible losses"
                                        -Gen. Geo. A. Custer



                                            People in a Position to
Know, Inc.

ON PRAYER

Mal-2 was once asked by one of his Disciples if he often prayed to Eris.
He replied with these words:

No, we Erisians seldom pray, it is much too dangerous. Charles Fort has
listed many factual incidences of ignorant people confronted with, say,
a drought, and then praying fervently -- and then getting the entire
village wiped out in a torrential flood.


"Of course I'm crazy, but that doesn't mean I'm wrong. I'm mad but not
ill"
                        (Werewolf Bridge, Robert Anton Wison)

2920


14. Wipe thine ass with what is written and grin like a ninny at what is
Spoken. Take thine refuge with thine wine in the Nothing behind
Everything, as you hurry along the Path.
        THE PURPLE SAGE
        HBT; The Book of Predictions, Chap. 19


Heaven is down. Hell is up.
This is proven by the fact 
that the planets and stars 
are orderly in their
movements,                                      IGNOTUM PER IGNOTIUS
while down on earth                     The meaning of this is unknown
we come close to the 
primal chaos.
There are four other
proofs,
but I forget them.

        -Josh the Dill
         King Kong Kabal

      IT IS MY FIRM BELIEF THAT IT IS A MISTAKE TO HOLD FIRM BELIEFS.


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The Classical Greeks were not influenced by the Classical Greeks.  
   
                       DO NOT CIRCULATE!


                     What We Know About ERIS  (not much)

The Romans left a likeness of Her for posterity-- She was shown as a
grotesque woman with a pale and ghastly look, Her eyes afire, Her
garment ripped and torn, and women look pale and ghastly when concealing
a chilly dagger in their bosoms.

Her geneology is from the Greeks and is utterly confused. Either She was
the twin of Ares and the daughter of Zeus and Hera; or She was the
daughter of Nyx, goddess of night (who was either the daughter or wife
of Chaos, or both), and Nyx's brother, Erebus, and whose brothers and
sisters include Death, Doom, Mockery, and Friendship. And that She begat
Forgetfullness, Quarrels, Lies, and a bunch of gods and goddesses like
that.

One day Mal-2 consulted his Pineal Gland* and asked Eris if She really
created all of those terrible things. She told him that She had always
liked the Old Greeks, but that they cannot be trusted with historic mat-
ters. "They were," She added, "victims of indigestion, you know."

Suffice it to say that Eris is not hateful or malicious. But She is
mischievous, and does get a little bitchy at times.

*THE PINEAL GLAND is where each and every one of us can talk to Eris. If
youhave trouble activating your Pineal, then try the appendix which does
almost as well. Reference: DOGMA I, METAPHYSICS #3, "The Indoctrine of
2921

the Pineal Gland" 


                                DIRUIT AEDIFICAT MUTAT QUADRATA ROTUNDUS

                                                        -Horace
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様
2922

                              THE INSIDE STORY!

       The Law of Fives

        the Law of Fives is one of the oldest Erisian Mysterees. It was
first revealed to Good Lord Omar and is one of the great contributions
to come from The Hidden Temple of The Happy Jesus.

     POEE subscribes to the Law of Fives of Omar's sect. And POEE also
recognizes the holy 23 (2+3=5) that is incorporated by Episkopos Dr.
Mordecai Malignatus, KNS, into his Discordian sect, The Ancient Il-
luminated Seers of Bavaria. 

     The Law of Fives states simply that: ALL THINGS HAPPEN IN FIVES, OR
ARE DIVISIBLE BY OR ARE MULTIPLES OF FIVE, OR ARE SOMEHOW DIRECTLY OR
INDIRECTLY APPROPRIATE TO 5.

        The Law of Fives is never wrong.

     In the Erisian Archives is an old memo from Omar to Mal-2: "I find
the Law of Fives to be more and more manifest the harder I look."


    Please do not use this document as toilet tissue

        The Nagas of Upper Burma say that the sun
        shines by day because, being a woman, it
        is afraid to venture out at night.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"You will find that the State is the kind of ORGANIZATION which, though
it does big things badly, does small things badly too."
                                        - John Kenneth Galbraith

                      THE MYTH OF THE APPLE OF DISCORD
     It seems that Zeus was preparing a wedding banquet for Peleus and
Thetis and did not want to invite Eris because of Her reputation as a
trouble maker.*

     This made Eris angry, and so She fashioned an apple of pure gold**
and inscribed upon it KALLISTI ("To The Prettiest One") and on the day
of the fete She rolled it into the banquet hall and then left to be
alone and joyously partake of a hot dog.

     Now, three of the invited goddesses,*** Athena, Hera, and Aphro-
dite, each immediately claimed it to belong to herself because of the
inscription.  And they started fighting, and they started throwing punch
all over the place and everything.

     Finally Zeus calmed things down and declared that an arbitrator
must be selected, which was a reasonable suggestion, and all agreed. He
sent them to a shepherd of Troy, whose name was Paris because his mother
had had a lot of gaul and had married a Frenchman; but each of the
sneaky goddesses tried to outwit the others by going early and offering
a bribe to Paris.
        Athena offered him Heroic War Victories, Hera offered him Great
Wealth, and Aphrodite offered him the Most Beautiful Woman on Earth.
Being a healthy young Trojan lad, Paris promptly accepted Aphrodite's
bribe and she got the apple and he got screwed.
2923

     As she had promised, she maneuvered earthly happenings so that
Pariscould have Helen (The Helen) then living with her husband Mene-
laus,King of Sparta. Anyway, everyone knows that the Trojan War followed
when Sparta demanded their Queen back and that the Trojan War is said to
be The First War among men.

     And so we suffer because of the Original Snub. And so a Discordian
is to partake of No Hot Dog Buns.   Do you believe that?
-------------------------------------
* This is called THE DOCTRINE OF THE ORIGINAL SNUB
** There is historic disagreement concerning whether this apple was of
metalic gold or acapulco.
*** Actually there were five goddesses, but the Greeks did not know the
Law of Fives.



                                 REMEMBER:
                                 KING
                                 KONG
                                 DIED FOR
                                 YOUR SINS


                                                        Ho Chi Zen
                                                           is
                                                        King Cong

5. An Age of Confusion, or an Ancient Age, is one in which History As We
Know It begins to unfold, in which Whatever Is Coming emerges in
Corporal Form, more or less, and such times are Ages of Balanced
Unbalance, or Unbalanced Balance.

6. An Age of Bureaucracy is an Imperial Age in which Things Mature, in
which Confusion becomes entrenched and during which Balanced Balance,or
Stagnation, is attained.

7. An Age of Disorder or an Aftermath is an Apocalyptic Period of
Transition back to Chaos through the Screen of Oblivion into which the
Age passeth, finally. These are Ages of Unbalanced Unbalance.
                HBT; The Book of Uterus, Chap. 3

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Do You Remember?
1. Polite children will always remember that a church is the ______ of
_____.

様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様
2924

An Erisian Hymn
        by Rev. Dr. Mungojerry Grindlebone, KOB
             Episkopos, THE RAYVILLE APPLE PANTHERS

Onwards Christian Soldiers,
Onwards Buddhist Priests.
Onward, Fruits of Islam,
Fight till you're deceased.
Fight your little battles.
Join in thickest fray;
For the Greater Glory,
of Dis-cord-i-a.
Yah, yah, yah,
Yah, yah, yah, yah.
Blfffffffffffft!
 

Mr. Momomoto, famous Japanese who can swallow his nose,has been
exposed. It was recently revealed that it was Mr. Momomoto's brother who
has been doing all this nose swallowing.

                                
                                        Heute Die Welt
                                        Morgens das Sonnensystem!

                        Abbey of the Barbarous Relic
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Official Proclamation -- ODD# III(b)/4,i;18Aft3135
--------------------------------------------------

                        POEE DISORGANIZATIONAL MATRIX

V) The House of Apostle of ERIS
   For the Eristocracy and the Cabalablia

   A. The Five Apostles of ERIS
   B. The Golden Apple Corps (KSC)
   C. Episkoposes of The Discordian Society
   D. POEE Cabal Priests
   E. Saints, Erisian Avatars, and Like Personages

IV) The House of the Rising Podge
    for the Disciples of Discordia

   A. Office of My High Reverence, The Polyfather
   B. Council of POEE Priests
   C. The LEGION OF DYNAMIC DISCORD
   D. Eristic Avatars
   E. Aneristic Avatars

III) The House of the Rising Hodge
     For the Bureaucracy

   A. the Bureau of Erisian Archives
   B. the Bureau of The POEE Epistolary, and The Division of Dogmas
   C. The Bureau of Symbols,Emblems, Certificates and Such
   D. The Bureau of Eristic Affairs, and The Administry for The
Unenlightened  Eristic Horde
2925

   E. The Bureau of Aneristic Affairs, and the Administry for the Orders
of Discordia

II) The House of the Rising Collapse
   For the Encouragement of Liberation of Freedom, and/or the Dis-
couragement of the Immanentizing of the Eschaton

   A. The Breeze of Wisdom      and/or  The Wind of Insanity
   B. The Breeze of Integrity   and/or  The Wind of Arrogance
   C. The Breeze of Beauty      and/or  The Wind of Outrages
   D. The Breeze of Love        and/or  The Wind of Bombast
   E. The Breeze of Laughter    and/or  The Wind of Bullshit

I) The Out House
   For what is left over

   A. Miscellaneous Avatars
   B. The Fifth Column
   C. POEE =POPES= everywhere
   D. Drawer "O" for OUT OF FILE
   E. Lost Documents and Forgotten Truths

                        -><-  OFFICIAL - POEE
                              Head Temple, San Francisco
                              HOUSE OF THE RISING PODGE
                              Bureau of The POEE Epistolary

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
                     = THE FIVE FINGERED HAND OF ERIS =

The official symbol of POEE is here illustrated. It may be this, or any
similar device to represent TWO OPPOSING ARROWS CONVERGING INTO A COMMON
POINT. It may be vertical, horizontal, or else such, and it may be
elaborated or simplified as desired.

The esoteric name for this symbol is THE FIVE FINGERED HAND OF ERIS,
commonly shortened to THE HAND.
                            \  /
                        -----><-----
                            /  \

NOTE: In the lore of western magic, the \/ is taken to symbolize horns,
especially the horns of Satan or of diabolical beasties. The Five
Fingered Hand of Eris, however, is not intended to be taken as satanic,
for the "horns" are supported by another set, of inverted "horns". Or
maybe it is walrus tusks. I don't know what it is, to tell the truth.


        "Surrealism aims at the total transformation of the mind
        and all that resembles it"
                                                -Breton
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
                               -><- POEE -><-

POEE (pronounced "POEE") is an acronym for The PARATHEO-ANAMETAMYSTIKHO-
OD OF ERIS ESOTERIC. The first part can be taken to mean "equivalent
deity,reversity beyond-mystique." We are not really esoteric, it's just
that nobody pays much attention to us.
2926

MY HIGH REVERENCE MALACLYPSE THE YOUNGER, AB, DD, KSC, is the High
Priest of POEE, and POEE is grounded in his episkopotic revelations of
The Goddess. He is called [The Omnibenevolent Polyfather of Virginity in
Gold].

The POEE HEAD TEMPLE is the Joshua Norton Cabal of The Discordian
Society, which is located in Mal-2's pineal gland and can be found by
temporally and spacially locating the rest of Mal-2.

POEE has no treasury, no by-laws, no articles, no guides save Mal-2's
pineal gland, and has only one scruple-- which Mal-2 keeps on his key
chain.

POEE has not registered,incorporated, or otherwise chartered with the
State, and so the State does not recognize POEE or POEE Ordinations,
which is only fair, because POEE does not recognize the State.

POEE has 5 DEGREES:
        There is the neophyte, or LEGIONNAIRE DISCIPLE.
        The LEGIONNAIRE DEACON, who is catching on.
        An Ordained POEE PRIEST/PRIESTESS or a CHAPLIN.
        The HIGH PRIEST, the Polyfather.
        And POEE =POPE=.

POEE LEGIONNAIRE DISCIPLES are authorized to initiate others as
Discordian Society Legionnaires. PRIESTS appoint their own DEACONS. The
POLYFATHER ordains priests. I don't know about the =POPES=.

" This book is a mirror. When a monkey looks in, no apostle looks out."
                                        -Lichtenberg

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

                      Application For Membership
           In the Erisian movement of the DISCORDIA SOCIETY

1. Today's date                         Yesterday's Date

2. Purpose of this application: --membership in : a. Legion of Dynamic
Discord
   b. POEE  c. Bavarian Illuminati d. All of the Above  e. None of the
Above
   f. Other-- BE SPECIFIC!

3. Name_________________________                Holy Name_____________ 
   
   Address_____________________________________________________________
         (If temporary, also give an address from which mail can be
forwarded)

4. Description: Born: []Yes []No   Eyes:[]2 []other     Height:

   ..... fl. oz.   Last time you had a haircut:         Reason:

   Race: []horse []human      I.Q.: 150-200  200-250  250-300  over 300

5. History: Education - highest grade completed 1 2 3 4 5 6 over 6th
   Professional: On another ream of paper list every job since 1937 from
2927

which    you have been fired. Medical: On a separate sheet labeled
"confidential" list all major psychic psychotic episodes experienced
within the last 24   hours   


6. Sneaky Questions to establish personality traits 
   I would rather a. live in an outhouse b. play in a rock group c. eat
   caterpillars.  I wear obscene tattoos because ..........
   I have ceased raping little children []yes []no -- reason .......... 

7. Self Portrait





Rev. Mungo
For Office Use Only -- acc. rej. burned

                                                LICK HERE!!!
                                        
                                                    *

                                                (You may be one
                                                 of the lucky 25)


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

-><-

POEE & It's Priests

If you like Erisianism as it is presented according to Mal-2, then you
may wish to form your own POEE CABAL as a POEE PRIEST and you can go do
a bunch of POEE Priestly Things. A "POEE Cabal" is exactly what you
think it is.

The High Priest makes no demands on his Priests, though he does rather
expect good will of them. The Office of The Polyfather is point, not to
teach. Once in a while, he even listens.

Should you find that your own revelations of The Goddess become
substantially different that the revelations of Mal-2, then perhaps the
Goddess has plans for you as an Episkopos, and you might consider
creating your own sect from scratch, unhindered. Episkoposes are not
competing with each other, and they are all POEE priests anyway (as soon
as I locate them). The point is that Episkoposes are developing separate
paths to the Erisian mountain top. See the section "Discordian Society"

ORDINATION AS A POEE PRIEST

There are no particular qualifications for Ordination because if you
want to be a POEE Priest then you must undoubtedly qualify. Who could
possibly know better than you whether or not you should be Ordained?

An ORDAINED POEE PRIEST or PRIESTESS is defined as "one who holds an
Ordination Certificate from the Office of the Polyfather."
2928


        Seek into the Chao if thou wouldst be wise
        And find ye delight in Her Great Surprise!
        Look into the Chao if thou wantest to know
        What's in a Chao and why it ain't so!
          (HBT; The Book of Advise, 1:1)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
                      World Council of Churches Boutique

Note to POEE Priests:

The Polyfather wishes to remind all Erisians the POEE was conceived not
as a commercial enterprise, and that you are requested to keep your cool
when seeking funds for POEE Cabals or when spreading the POEE Word via
the market place.


The Hidden stone ripens fast,
then laid bare like a turnip
can easily be cut out at last
but even then the danger isn't past.
That man lives best who's fain
to live half mad, half sane.
        -Flemish Poet Jan Van 
         Stijevoort, 1524.


                           The Erisian Affirmation

BEFORE THE GODDESS ERIS, I (name or holyname), do herewith declare
myself a POEE BROTHER of THE LEGION OF DYNAMIC DISCORD.
HAIL HAIL HAIL HAIL HAIL ERIS ERIS ERIS ERIS ERIS ALL HAIL DISCORDIA!

the presiding POEE Official (if any) responds:

 ALL HAIL DISCORDIA!


find the goddess Eris                           To Diverse Gods 
Within your Pineal Gland                        Do Mortals bow;
      POEE                                      Holy Cow, and
                                                Wholly Chao
                                                -Rev. Dr. Grindlebone
                                                 Monroe Cabal

"common sense is what tells you that the world is flat."


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
This is St. Gulik. He is the Messenger of the Goddess. A different age
from ours called him Hermes. Many people called him by many names. He is
a Roach.

________________________________________________________________________



2929

                          Legion of Dynamic Discord

                                     HARK

       RECOGNIZE that the -- DISCORDIAN SOCIETY -- doth hereby certify


                               As a Legionnaire


                                        
                                                Glory to We Children of
ERIS
                                        
                                                  Presented under the
auspices
                                                  of our Lady of
Discord, ERIS
                                                  by the House of the
Apostles
                                                  of ERIS.

                                                        -><-
________________________________________________________________________
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
                          HOW TO START A POEE CABAL
                  WITHOUT MESSING AROUND WITH THE POLYFATHER

If you can't find the Polyfather, or having found him, don't want
anything to do with him, you are still authorized to form your own POEE
CABAL and do Priestly Things, using the Principia Discordia as a guide.
Your Official Rank will be POEE CHAPLIN for the LEGION OF DYNAMIC
DISCORD, which is exactly the same as a POEE PRIEST except that you
don't have an Ordination Certificate.  The words you are now reading are
your ordination.

HOW TO BECOME A POEE CHAPLIN

1. Write the ERISIAN AFFIRMATION in five copies.
2. Sign and nose-print each copy.
3. Send one to the President of the United States.
4. Send one to
        The California State Bureau of Furniture and Bedding
        1021 'D' Street, Sacramento CA 94814
5. Nail one to a telephone pole. Hide one. And burn the other.
Then consult your pineal gland.


General License was Sgt. Pepper's Commander


                            ~~ OLD POEE SLOGAN ~~
                           When in Doubt, Fuck it.
                      When not in Doubt... get in Doubt!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Trip 5!

2930

                         = The POEE Baptismal Rite =
 This Mysteree Rite is not required for initiation, but it is offered by
many POEE Priests to proselytes who desire a formal ceremony.

1) The Priests and four Brothers are arranged in a pentagon with the
Initiate in the center facing the Priests. If possible, the Brothers on
the immediate right and left of the Priest should be Deacons. The
Initiate must be totally naked, to demonstrate that he is truly a human
being and not something else in disguise like a cabbage or something.

2) All persons in the audience and the pentagon, excepting the Priest,
assume a squatting position and return to a standing position. This is
repeated four more times. This dance is symbolic of the humility of we
Erisians.

3) The Priest begins:
   I, (complete Holy Name, with Mystical Titles, and degrees, designa-
tions, offices, &tc.), Ordained Priest of the Paratheo-anametamystikhood
of Eris Esoteric, with the Authority invested at me by the High Priest
of It, Office of the Polyfather, The House of the Rising Podge, POEE
Head Temple; Do herewith Require of Ye:

        1) ARE YE A HUMAN BEING AND NOT A CABBAGE OR SOMETHING? The
Initiate answers YES.
        2) THAT'S TOO BAD. DO YE WISH TO BETTER THYSELF? The Initiate
answers YES.
        3) HOW STUPID. ARE YE WILLING TO BECOME PHILOSOPHICALLY
ILLUMINIZED? He answers YES.
        4) VERY FUNNY. WILL YE DEDICATE YESELF TO THE HOLEY ERISIAN
MOVEMENT? The Initiate answers PROBABLY.
        5) THEN SWEAR YE THE FOLLOWING AFTER ME:
(The Priest here leads the Initiate in a recital of THE ERISIAN
AFFIRMATION.)
The Priest continues: THEN I DO HERE PROCLAIM YE POEE DISCIPLE (name),
LEGIONNAIRE OF THE LEGION OF DYNAMIC DISCORD. HAIL ERIS! HAIL HAIL! HAIL
YES!

4) All present rejoice grandly. The new Brother opens a large jug of
wine and offers it to all who are present.

5) The Ceremony generally degenerates.


Mord says that Omar says that we are all unicorns anyway.

                                            DO NOT PULL ON YELLOW TIP

3. And though Omar did bid of the Collector of Garbage, in words that
were both sweet and bitter, to surrender back the cigar box containing
the cards designated by the Angel as The Honest Book of Truth, the
Collector was to him as one who might be smitten deaf, saying only:
'Gainst the rules, y' know.
様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様
2931

        HBT; The Book of Explanations, Chap 2



                                                     Answers:
                                                1. Harry Houdini
                                                2. Swing Music
                                                3. Pretzels
                                                4. 8 months
                                                5. Testy Culbert
                                                6. It protrudes.
                                                7. No vocal cords

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
                            THE POEE MYSTEREE OATH        G3400
                                                            50
The Initiate swears the following:                         DMTS
                                                            19
        FLYING BABY SHIT!!!!!

(Brothers of the Ancient Illuminated Seers of Bavaria sect may wish to
substitute the German:
        FLIEGENDE KINDERSCHEISSE!
or perhaps
        WIECZNY KWIAT WTADZA!!!!!
which is Ewige Blumenkraft in Polish.)


THE RECENT EXPOSE THAT MR. MOMOMOTO, FAMOUS JAPANESE WHO CAN SWALLOW HIS
NOSE, CANNOT SWALLOW HIS NOSE BUT HIS BROTHER CAN, HAS BEEN EXPOSED! IT
IS MR. MOMOMOTO WHO CAN SWALLOW HIS NOSE. HE SWALLOWED HIS BROTHER IN
THE SUMMER OF '44. 

Corrections to last week's copy: Johnny Sample is offensive cornerback
for the New York Jets, not fullback as stated. Bobby Tolan's name is not
Randy, but mud. All power to the people, and ban the fucking bomb.


                                          "This statement is false"
                                                   (courtesy of POEE)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
                         NO TWO EQUALS ARE THE SAME!

                            THE DISCORDIAN SOCIETY

The Discordian Society has no definition.

I sometimes think of it as a disorganization of Eris Freaks. It has been
called a guerrilla mind theatre. Episkopos Randomfactor, Director of
Purges of Our People's Underworld Movement sect in Larchmont, prefers
"The World's Greatest Association of What-ever-it-is-that-we-are." Lady
Mal thinks of it as a RENAISSANCE THINK TANK. Fang the Unwashed, WKC,
won't say. You can think of it any way you like.

AN EPISKOPOS OF THE DISCORDIAN SOCIETY
is one who prefers total autonomy, and creates his own Discordian sect
as The Goddess directs him. He speaks for himself and for those that say
that they like what he says.
2932

THE LEGION OF DYNAMIC DISCORD:
A Discordian Society Legionnaire is one who prefers not to create his
own sect. 

If you want in on the Discordian Society then declare yourself what you
wish do what you like and tell us about it or if you prefer don't.

There are no rules anywhere.            Some Episkoposes
The Goddess Prevails.                   have a one-man cabal.
                                        Some work together.
                                        Some never do explain.


When I get to the bottom I go back to the top
of the slide where I stop and I turn and I go
for a ride, then I get to the bottom and I see
you again! Helter Skelter!
                        -John Lennon

"Everybody I know who is right always agrees with ME" -Rev Lady Mal

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
THE GOLDEN APPLE CORPS

The Golden Apple Corps* is an honorary position for the Keepers of The
Sacred Chao, so that they can put "KSC" after their names.

It says little,
does less,
means
nothing.

* Not to be confused with The Apple Corps Ltd. of those four singers. We
thought of it first.


                            - The Numeral V sign -
Used by Old Roman Discordians, Illuminatus Churchill, and innocent
Hippies everywhere.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
PERPETUAL DATE CONVERTER FROM GREGORIAN TO POEE CALENDAR

Seasons
   1) Chaos - Patron Apostle Hung Mung
   2) Discord - Patron Apostle Dr. Van Van Mojo
   3) Confusion - Patron Apostle Sri Syadasti
   4) Bureaucracy - Patron Apostle Zarathud
   5) The Aftermath - Patron Apostle The Elder Malaclypse

Days of the Week*                 * The DAYS OF THE WEEK
   1) Sweetmorn                   are named from the five Basic
Elements:
   2) Boomtime                 SWEET, BOOM, PUNGENT, PRICKLE, and ORANGE
   3) Pungenday
   4) Prickle-Prickle
   5) Setting Orange

2933

HOLYDAYS

A) APOSTLE HOLYDAYS                             B) SEASON HOLYDAYS
   1) Mungday                                      1) Chaoflux
   2) Mojoday                                      2) Discoflux
   3) Syaday                                       3) Confuflux
   4) Zaraday                                      4) Bureflux
   5) Maladay                                      5) Afflux
Each occurs on the 5th                          Each occurs on the 50th
day of the Season                               day of each Season

C) ST. TIB'S DAY - occurs once every 4 years (1+4=5) and is inserted
between the 59th and 60th days of the Season of Chaos


                    SM BT PD PP SO                          SM BT PD PP SO
                    -- -- -- -- --                          -- -- -- -- --
Jan  1  2  3  4  5   1  2  3  4  5 Chs  Jul  5  6  7  8  9  40 41 42 43 44
Cfn
     6  7  8  9 10   6  7  8  9 10          10 11 12 13 14  45 46 47 48 49  
 
    11 12 13 14 15  11 12 13 14 15          15 16 17 18 19  50 51 52 53 54  
 
    16 17 18 19 20  16 17 18 19 20          20 21 22 23 24  55 56 57 58 59  
 
    21 22 23 24 25  21 22 23 24 25          25 26 27 28 29  60 61 62 63 64  
 
    26 27 28 29 30  26 27 28 29 30          30 31  1  2  3  65 66 67 68 69  
 
    31  1  2  3  4  31 32 33 34 35      Aug  4  5  6  7  8  70 71 72 73  1
Bcy
Feb  5  6  7  8  9  36 37 38 39 40           9 10 11 12 13   2  3  4  5  6  
 
    10 11 12 13 14  41 42 43 44 45          14 15 16 17 18   7  8  9 10 11  
 
    15 16 17 18 19  46 47 48 49 50          19 20 21 22 23  12 13 14 15 16  
 
    20 21 22 23 24  51 52 53 54 55          24 25 26 27 28  17 18 19 20 21  
 
    25 26 27 28* 1  56 57 58 59 60          29 30 31  1  2  22 23 24 25 26  
 
Mar  2  3  4  5  6  61 62 63 64 65      Sep  3  4  5  6  7  27 28 29 30 31  
 
     7  8  9 10 11  66 67 68 69 70           8  9 10 11 12  32 33 34 35 36  
 
    12 13 14 15 16  71 72 73  1  2 Dsc      13 14 15 16 17  37 38 39 40 41  
 
    17 18 19 20 21   3  4  5  6  7          18 19 20 21 22  42 43 44 45 46  
 
    22 23 24 25 26   8  9 10 11 12          23 24 25 26 27  47 48 49 50 51  
 
    27 28 29 30 31  13 14 15 16 17          28 29 30  1  2  52 53 54 55 56  
様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様
 2934

Apr  1  2  3  4  5  18 19 20 21 22      Oct  3  4  5  6  7  57 58 59 60 61  
 
     6  7  8  9 10  23 24 25 26 27           8  9 10 11 12  62 63 64 65 66  
 
    11 12 13 14 15  28 29 30 31 32          13 14 15 16 17  67 68 69 70 71  
 
    16 17 18 19 20  33 34 35 36 37          18 19 20 21 22  72 73  1  2  3
Afm
    21 22 23 24 25  38 39 40 41 42          23 24 25 26 27   4  5  6  7  8  
 
    26 27 28 29 30  43 44 45 46 47          28 29 30 31  1   9 10 11 12 13  
 
May  1  2  3  4  5  48 49 50 51 52      Nov  2  3  4  5  6  14 15 16 17 18  
 
     6  7  8  9 10  53 54 55 56 57           7  8  9 10 11  19 20 21 22 23  
 
    11 12 13 14 15  58 59 60 61 62          12 13 14 15 16  24 25 26 27 28  
 
    16 17 18 19 20  63 64 65 66 67          17 18 19 20 21  29 30 31 32 33  
 
    21 22 23 24 25  68 69 70 71 72          22 23 24 25 26  34 35 36 37 38  
 
    26 27 28 29 30  73  1  2  3  4 Cfn      27 28 29 30  1  39 40 41 42 43  
 
    31  1  2  3  4   5  6  7  8  9      Dec  2  3  4  5  6  44 45 46 47 48  
 
Jun  5  6  7  8  9  10 11 12 13 14           7  8  9 10 11  49 50 51 52 53  
 
    10 11 12 13 14  15 16 17 18 19          12 13 14 15 16  54 55 56 57 58  
 
    15 16 17 18 19  20 21 22 23 24          17 18 19 20 21  59 60 61 62 63  
 
    20 21 22 23 24  25 26 27 28 29          22 23 24 25 26  64 65 66 67 68  
 
    25 26 27 28 29  30 31 32 33 34          27 28 29 30 31  69 70 71 72 73  
 
    30  1  2  3  4  35 36 37 38 39     [1991 = 3157][Next St. Tibs Day in
3158]



~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
                              HOLY NAMES

Discordians have a tradition of assuming HOLY NAMES. This is not
unique to Erisianism, of course. I suppose that Pope Paul is the son
of Mr. and Mrs. VI?



Will whoever stole Brother Reverend Magoun's pornography please return
it.

様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様
2935

                       THE BEARER OF THIS CARD
                     IS A GENUINE AND AUTHORIZED
                               ~ POPE ~
                      So please Treat Him Right
                             GOOD FOREVER

       Genuine and authorized by The House of Apostles of ERIS
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
Every man, woman and child on this Earth is a genuine and authorized
Pope Reproduce and distribute these cards freely- POEE Head Temple, San
Francisco


A =POPE= is someone who is not under the authority of the authorities.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
For Your Enlightenment

                         THE PARABLE OF THE BITTER TEA
                                      by
                       Rev. Dr. Hypocrates Magoun, P.P.
                          POEE PRIEST, Okinawa Cabal

        When Hypoc was through meditating with St. Gulik, he went there
into the kitchen where he busied himself with preparing the feast and in
his endeavor, he found that there was some old tea in a pan left
standing from the night before, when he had in his weakness forgot about
its making and had let it sit steeping for 24 hours. It was dark and
murky and it was Hypoc's intention to use this old tea by diluting it
with water. And again in his weakness, chose without further considera-
tion and plunged into the physical labor of the preparations. It was
then when deeply immersed in the pleasure of that trip, he had a sudden
loud clear voice in his head saying "it is bitter tea that involves you
so." Hypoc heard the voice, but the struggle inside intensified, and the
pattern, previously established with the physical laboring and the
muscle messages coordinated and unified or perhaps coded, continued to
exert their influence and Hypoc succummed to the pressure and he denied
the voice. 
        And again he plunged into the physical orgy and completed the
task, and Lo as the voice had predicted, the tea was bitter.

                                "The Five Laws have root in awareness."
                                        --Che Fung (Ezra Pound, Canto
85)

The Hell Law says that Hell is reserved exclusively for them that
believe in it. Further, the lowest Rung in Hell is reserved for them
that believe in it on the supposition that they'll go there if they
don't.
     HBT; The Gospel According to Fred, 3:1

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A SERMON ON ETHICS AND LOVE

        One day Mal-2 asked the messenger spirit Saint Gulik to approach
the Goddess and request Her presence for some desperate advice. Shortly
afterwards the radio came on by itself, and an ethereal female Voice
said YES?
2936

        "O! Eris! Blessed Mother of Man! Queen of Chaos! Daughter of
Discord!  Concubine of Confusion! O! Exquisite Lady, I beseech You to
lift a heavy burden from my heart!"

        WHAT BOTHERS YOU, MAL? YOU DON'T SOUND WELL.

        "I am filled with fear and tormented with terrible visions of
pain.  Everywhere people are hurting one another, the planet is rampant
with injustices, whole societies plunder groups of their own people,
mothers imprison sons, children perish while brothers war. O, woe."

        WHAT IS THE MATTER WITH THAT, IF IT IS WHAT YOU WANT TO DO?

        "But nobody Wants it! Everybody hates it."

        OH. WELL, THEN STOP.

        At which moment She turned herself into an aspirin commercial
and left The Polyfather stranded alone with his species.


SINISTER DEXTER HAS A BROKEN SPIROMETER.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
                            CHAPTER 5: THE PIONEERS
                  =THE FIVE APOSTLES OF ERIS & WHO THEY BE =

1. HUNG MUNG
A Sage of Ancient China and Official Discordian Missionary to the
Heathen Chinee. He who originally devised THE SACRED CHAO. Patron of the
Season of Chaos. Holyday: Jan 5.

2. DR. VAN VAN MOJO
A Head Doctor of Deep Africa and Maker of Fine Dolls. D.H.V., Doctor of
Hoodoo and Vexes, from The Greater Metropolitan Yorba Linda Jesus Will
Save Your Bod Home Study Bible School; and F.I.H.G.W.P., Fellow of the
Intergalactic Haitian Guerrillas for World Peace. Patron of The Season
of Discord. Holyday: Mar 19.
[NOTE: Erisians of The Laughing Christ sect are of the silly contention
that Dr. Mojo is an imposter and that PATAMUNZO LINGANANDA is the True
Second Apostle. Lord Omar claims that Dr. Mojo heaps hatred upon
Patamunzo, who sends only Love Vibrations in return. But we of the POEE
sect know that Patamunzo is the Real Imposter, and that those vibrations
of his are actually an attempt to subvert Dr. Mojo's rightful apostilic
authority by shaking him out of his wits.

3. SRI SYADASTI SYADAVAKTAVYA SYADASTI SYANNASTI SYADASTI CAVAKTAVYASCA
SYADASTI SYANNASTI SYADAVATAVYASCA SYADASTI SYANNASTI SYADAVAKTAVYASCA
commonly called just SRI SYADASTI
His name is Sanskrit, and means: All affirmations are true in some
sense, false in some sense, meaningless in some sense, true and false in
some sense, true and meaningless in some sense, false and meaningless in
some sense, and true and false and meaningless in some sense.
He is an Indian Pundit and Prince, born of the Peyotl Tribe, son of
Gentle Chief Sun Flower Seed and the squaw Merry Jane. Patron to
psychedelic type Discordians. Patron of the Season of Confusion.
Holyday: May 31. NOTE: Sri Syadasti should not be confused with BLESSED
ST. GULIK THE STONED, who is not the same person but is the same 
2937

Apostle.

4. ZARATHUD THE INCORRIGIBLE, sometimes called ZARATHUD THE STAUNCH
A hard nosed Hermit of Medieval Europe and Chaosphe Bible Banger. Dubbed
"Offender of The Faith." Discovered the Five Commandments. Patron of the
Season of Bureaucracy. Holyday: Aug. 12

5. THE ELDER MALACLYPSE
A wandering Wiseman of Ancient Mediterrania ("Med-Terra" or middle
earth), who followed a 5-pointed Star through the alleys of Rome,
Damascus, Baghdad, Jerusalem, Mecca and Cairo, bearing a sign that
seemed to read "DOOM". (This is a misunderstanding. The sign actually
read "DUMB". Mal-1 is a Non-Prophet.) Patron and namesake of Mal-2.
Patron on The Season of The Aftermath. Holyday: Oct 24.

All statements are true in some sense, false in some sense, meaningless
in some sense, true and false in some sense, true and meaningless in
some sense, false and meaningless in some sense, and true and false and
meaningless in some sense. A public service clarification by the Sri
Syadasti School of Spiritual Wisdom, Wilmette. 

The teachings of the Sri Syadasti School of Spiritual School of
Spiritual Wisdom are true in some sense, false in some sense, meaning-
less in some sense, true and false in some sense, true and meaningless
in some sense, false and meaningless in some sense, and true and false
and meaningless in some sense.
Patamunzo Lingananda School of Higher Spiritual Wisdom, Skokie.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Hey Man...Great! I feel goofy, the way my old man looks when he's drunk.



                          THE HONEST BOOK OF TRUTH
                   being a BIBLE of The Erisian Movement

                         and How it was Revealed to
          Episkopos LORD OMAR KHAYYAM RAVENHURST, KSC; Bull Goose
        of Limbo; and Master Pastor of the Church Invisible of
        the Laughing Christ, Hidden Temple of The Happy Jesus,
                  Laughing Buddha Jesus [LBJ] Ranch


                    From the Honest Book of Truth
                 THE BOOK OF EXPLANATIONS, Chapter 1

1. There came one day to Lord Omar, Bull Goose of Limbo, a Messenger
of Our Lady who told him of a Sacred Mound wherein was buried an
Honest Book.

2. And the Angel of Eris bade of the Lord: Go ye hence and dig the
Truth, that ye may come to know it and, knowing it, spread it and,
spreading it, wallow in it and, wallowing in it, lie in it and ,lying
in the Truth, become a Poet of the Word and a Sayer of Sayings -- an
Inspiration to all men and a Scribe to the Gods.

3. So Omar went forth to the Sacred Mound, which was to the East of
Mullah, and thereupon he worked digging in the sand for five days and
2938

five nights, but found no book.

4. At the end of five days and five nights of digging, it came to pass
that Omar was exhausted. So he put his shovel to one side and bedded
himself down on the sand, using as a pillow a Golden Chest he had
uncovered on the first day of his labors.

5. Omar slept.

6. On the fifth day of his sleeping, Lord Omar fell into a Trance, and
there came to him in the Trance a Dream, and there came to him in the
Dream a Messenger of Our Lady who told him of a Sacred Grove wherein
was hidden a Golden Chest.

7. And the Angel of Eris bade of the Lord: Go ye hence and lift the
Stash, that ye may come to own it and, owning it, share it and,
sharing it, love in it and, loving in it, dwell in it and, dwelling in
the Stash, become a Poet of the Word and a Sayer of Sayings - an
Inspiration to all men and a Scribe to the Gods.

8. But Omar lamented, saying unto the Angel: What is this shit,man?
What care I for the Word and Sayings? What care I for the Inspiration
of all men? Wherein does it profit a man to be a Scribe to the Gods
when the Scribes of the Governments do nothing, yet are paid better
wages?

9. And, lo, the Angel waxed in anger and Omar was stricken to the Ground

by an Invisible Hand and did not arise for five days and five nights.

10. And it came to pass that on the fifth night he dreampt, and in his
Dream he had a Vision, and in this Vision there came unto him a
Messenger of Our Lady who entrusted to him a Rigoletto cigar box
containing many filing cards, some of them in packs with rubber bands
around, and upon these cards were sometimes written verses, while upon
others nothing was written.

11. Thereupon the Angel Commanded to Lord: Take ye this Honest Book of
Truth to thine bosom and cherish it. Carry it forth into The Land and
Lay it before Kings of Nations and Collectors of Garbage. Preach from
it unto the Righteous, that they may renounce their ways and repent.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
                          CONVENTIONAL CHAOS

GREYFACE

In the year 1166 B.C., a malcontented hunchbrain by the name of
Greyface, got it into his head that the universe was as humorless as
he, and he began to teach that play was sinful because it contradicted
the ways of Serious Order. "Look at all the order around you," he
said. And from that, he deluded honest men to believe that reality was
a straightjacket affair and not the happy romance as men had known it.

It is not presently understood why men were so gullible at that
particular time, for absolutely no one thought to observe all the
disorder around them and conclude just the opposite. But anyway,
Greyface and his followers took the game of playing at life more
2939

seriously than they took life itself and were known even to destroy
other living beings whose ways of life differed from their own.

The unfortunate result of this is that mankind has since been
suffering from a psychological and spiritual imbalance. Imbalance causes
frustration, and frustration causes fear. And fear makes for a bad trip.
Man has been on a bad trip for a long time now.

It is called THE CURSE OF GREYFACE.




                                          Bullshit makes the flowers
                                                grow & that's beautiful.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Climb into the Chao with a friend or two
And follow the Way it carries you,
Adrift like a Lunatic Lifeboat Crew
Over the Waves in whatever you do.
        (HBT; The Book of Advise, 1:3)


[graphic deleted... if you wanna see it, READ THE BOOK]

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Meanwhile, at the Chinese laundromat...

                DOGMA I - METAPHYSICS #2, "COSMOLOGY"*

                          THE BOOK OF UTERUS
                    from the Honest Book of Truth
                        revealed to Lord Omar

1. Before the beginning was the Nonexistent Chao, balanced in Oblivion
by the Perfect Counterpushpull of the Hodge and the Podge.

2. Whereupon, by an Act of Happenstance, the Hodge began gradually to
overpower the Podge -- and the Primal Chaos thereby came to be.

3. So in the beginning was the Primal Chaos, balanced on the Edge of
Oblivion by the Perfect Counterpullpush of the Podge and the Hodge.

4. Whereupon, by the Law of Negative Reversal,** the Podge swiftly
underpowered the Hodge and Everything broke loose.

5. And therein emerged the Active Force of Discord, the Subtle Manifes-
tation of the Nonexistent Chao, to guide Everything along the Path back
to Oblivion - that it might not become lost among Precepts of Order in
the Region of Thud.

6. Forasmuch as it was Active, the Force of Discord entered the State of
Confusion, wherein It copulated with the Queen and begat ERIS, Our Lady
of Discord and Gross Manifestation of the Nonexistent Chao.

7. And under Eris Confusion became established, and was hence called
Bureaucracy; while over Bureaucracy Eris became established, and was
2940

hence called Discordia.

8. By the by it came to pass that the Establishment of Bureaucracy
perished in a paper shortage.

9. Thus it was, in accord with the Law of Laws.

10. During and after the Fall of the Establishment of Bureaucracy was
the Aftermath, an Age of Disorder in which calculation, computations,
and reckonings were put away by the Children of Eris in Acceptance and
Preparation for the Return to Oblivion to be followed by a Repetition of
the Universal Absurdity. Moreover, of Itself the Coming of Aftermath
waseth a Resurrection of the Freedom-flowing Chaos. HAIL ERIS!

11. Herein was set into motion the Eristic Pattern, which would Repeat
Itself Five Times Over Seventy-three Times, after which nothing would
happen.
____________________________
* This doctrine should not be confused with DOGMA III - HISTORY #6,
"HISTORIC CYCLES," which states that social progress occurs in five
cycles, the first three ("The Tricycle") of which are THESIS, ANTITHESIS
and PARENTHESIS; and the last two ("the Bicycle") of which are CONSTER-
NATION and MORAL WARPTITUDE.

** The LAW OF NEGATIVE REVERSAL states that if something does not happen
then the exact opposite will happen, only in exactly the opposite manner
from that in which it did not happen.


Dull but Sincere Filler
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"And, behold, thusly was the Law formulated: Imposition of Order =
escalation of Disorder!"
 [H.B.T. ; The Gospel According to Fred, 1:6]

THE FIVE ORDERS OF DISCORDIA ("THEM")
Gen. Pandaemonium, Commanding

The seeds of the ORDERS OF DISCORDIA were planted by Greyface into his
early disciples. They form the skeleton of the Aneristic Movement, which
over emphasizes the Principle of Order and is antagonistic to the
necessary compliment, the Principle of Disorder. The Orders are composed
of persons all hung up on authority, security and control; i.e., they
are blinded by the Aneristic Illusion. They do not know that they belong
to Orders of Discordia.  But we know.

1. The Military Order of THE KNIGHTS OF THE FIVE SIDED TEMPLE. This is
for all the soldiers and bureaucrats of the world.

2. The Political Order of THE PARTY FOR WAR ON EVIL. This is reserved
for lawmakers, censors, and like ilk.

3. The Academic Order of THE HEMLOCK FELLOWSHIP. They commonly inhabit
schools and universities, and dominate many of them.

4. The Social Order of THE CITIZENS COMMITTEE FOR CONCERNED CITIZENS.
This is mostly a grass-roots version of the more professional military,
political, academic and sacred Orders.
2941

5. The Sacred Order of THE DEFAMATION LEAGUE. Not much is known about
the D.L., but they are very ancient and quite possibly were founded by
Greyface himself.  It is known that they now have absolute domination
over all organized churches in the world. It is also believed that they
have been costuming cabbages and passing them off as human beings.

A person belonging to one or more Order is just as likely to carry a
flag of the counter-establishment as the flag of the establishment--
just as long as it is a flag.


Don't let THEM immanentize the Eschaton.

HIP-2-3-4, HIP-2-3-4
Go To Your Left-Right....

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
THE FOLLOWING IS QUOTED FROM BERGAN EVANS
ON NORBERT WEINER, NUCLEAR PHYSICIST

        The second concept Wiener has to establish is that of entropy.
Probability is a mathematical concept, coming from statistics. Entropy
comes from physics. It is the assertion-- established logically and
experimentally-- that the universe, by its nature, is "running down",
moving toward a state of inert uniformity devoid of form, matter,
hierarchy or differentiation.

        That is, in any given situation, less organization, more chaos,
is overwhelmingly more probable than tighter organization or more order.

        The tendency for entropy to increase in isolated systems is
expressed in the second law of thermodynamics-- perhaps the most
pessimistic and amoral formulation in all human thought.

        It applies however, to a closed system, to something that is an
isolated whole, not just a part. Within such systems there may be parts,
which draw their energy from the whole, that are moving at least
temporarily, in the opposite direction; in them order is increasing and
chaos is diminishing.

        The whirlpools that swirl in a direction opposed to the main
current are called "enclaves". And one of them is life, especially human
life, which in a universe moving inexorably towards chaos moves towards
increased order.


IF THE TELEPHONE RINGS TODAY..... WATER IT!
        -Rev. Thomas, Gnostic
         N.Y.C. Cabal


                                   Personal
PLANETARY Pi, which I discovered, is 61. It's a Time-Energy relationship
existing between sun and inner plants and I use it in arriving at many
facts unknown to science. For example, multiply nude earth's circum-
ference 24,902.20656 by 61 and you get the distance of moon's orbit
around the earth.  This is slightly less than the actual distance
because we have not yet considered earth's atmosphere. So be it. 
2942

Christopher Garth, Evanston


"I should have been a plumber."
        --Albert Einstein
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Grasshopper always wrong in argument with chicken"
                -Book of Chan compiled by O.P.U. sect


                         = ZARATHUD'S ENLIGHTENMENT =

        Before he became a hermit, Zarathud was a young Priest, and took
great delight in making fools of his opponents in front of his fol-
lowers.

        One day Zarathud took his students to a pleasant pasture and
there he confronted The Sacred Chao while She was contentedly grazing.

        "Tell me, you dumb beast." demanded the Priest in his commanding
voice, "why don't you do something worthwhile. What is your Purpose in
Life, anyway?"

        Munching the tasty grass, The Sacred Chao replied "MU".*

        Upon hearing this, absolutely nobody was enlightened. Primarily
because nobody could understand Chinese.

* "MU" is the Chinese ideogram for NO-THING


TAO FA TSU-DAN                                      FIND PEACE WITH A 
                                                    CONTENTED CHAO

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
                           THE SACRED CHAO

THE SACRED CHAO is the key to illumination. Devised by the Apostle Hung
Mung in ancient China, it was modified and popularized by the Taoists
and is sometimes called the YIN-YANG. The Sacred Chao is not the
Yin-Yang of the Taoists. It is the HODGE-PODGE of the Erisians. And,
instead of a Podge spot on the Hodge side, it has a PENTAGON which
symbolizes the ANERISTIC PRINCIPLE, and instead of a Hodge spot on the
Podge side, it depicts the GOLDEN APPLE OF DISCORDIA to symbolize the
ERISTIC PRINCIPLE.

The Sacred Chao symbolizes absolutely everything anyone need ever know
about absolutely anything, and more! It even symbolizes everything not
worth knowing, depicted by the empty space surrounding the Hodge-Podge.

HERE FOLLOWS SOME PSYCHO-METAPHYSICS.
If you are not hot for philosophy, best just to skip it.

        The Aneristic Principle is that of APPARENT ORDER; the Eristic
Principle is that of APPARENT DISORDER. Both order and disorder are man
made concepts and are artificial divisions of PURE CHAOS, which is a
level deeper that is the level of distinction making.

2943

        With our concept making apparatus called "mind" we look at
reality through the ideas-about-reality which our cultures give us. The
ideas-about-reality are mistakenly labeled "reality" and unenlightened
people are forever perplexed by the fact that other people, especially
other cultures, see "reality" differently. It is only the ideas-about-
-reality which differ. Real (capital-T True) reality is a level deeper
that is the level of concept.

        We look at the world through windows on which have been drawn
grids (concepts). Different philosophies use different grids. A culture
is a group of people with rather similar grids. Through a window we view
chaos, and relate it to the points on our grid, and thereby understand
it. The ORDER is in the GRID. That is the Aneristic Principle.

        Western philosophy is traditionally concerned with contrasting
one grid with another grid, and amending grids in hopes of finding a
perfect one that will account for all reality and will, hence, (say
unenlightened westerners) be True. This is illusory; it is what we
Erisians call the ANERISTIC ILLUSION. Some grids can be more useful than
others, some more beautiful than others, some more pleasant than others,
etc., but none can be more True than any other.

        DISORDER is simply unrelated information viewed through some
particular grid. But, like "relation", no-relation is a concept. Male,
like female, is an idea about sex. To say that male-ness is "absence of
female-ness", or vice versa, is a matter of definition and metaphysical-
ly arbitrary. The artificial concept of no-relation is the ERISTIC
PRINCIPLE.

        The belief that "order is true" and disorder is false or somehow
wrong, is the Aneristic Illusion. To say the same of disorder, is the
ERISTIC ILLUSION.

        The point is that (little-t) truth is a matter of definition
relative to the grid one is using at the moment, and that (capital-T)
Truth, metaphysical reality, is irrelevant to grids entirely. Pick a
grid, and through it some chaos appears ordered and some appears
disordered. Pick another grid, and the same chaos will appear dif-
ferently ordered and disordered. 
 
 Reality is the original Rorschach.

Verily! So much for all that.

The words of the Foolish and those of the Wise
Are not far apart in Discordian Eyes.
(HBT; The Book of Advise, 2:1)

The PODGE of the Sacred Chao is symbolized as The Golden Apple of
Discordia, which represents the Eristic Principle of Disorder. The
writing on it, "KALLISTI" is Greek for "TO THE PRETTIEST ONE" and refers
to an old myth about The Goddess. But the Greeks had only a limited
understanding of Disorder, and thought it to be a negative principle.

The Pentagon represents the Aneristic Principle of Order and symbolizes
the HODGE. The Pentagon has several references; for one,, it can be
taken to represent geometry, one of the earliest studies of formal order
to reach elaborate development;* for another, it specifically accords
2944

with THE LAW OF FIVES. 

THE TRUTH IS FIVE BUT MEN HAVE ONLY ONE NAME FOR IT.
                                -Patamunzo Lingananda

It is also the shape of the United States Military Headquarters, the
Pentagon Building, a most pregnant manifestation of straightjacket order
resting on a firm foundation of chaos and constantly erupting into
dazzling disorder; and this building is one of our more cherished
Erisian Shrines. Also it so happens that in times of medieval magic, the
pentagon was the generic symbol for werewolves, but this reference is
not particularly intended and it should be noted that the Erisian
Movement does not discriminate against werewolves-- our membership
roster is open to persons of all races, national origins and
hobbies.

____________________________________
* The Greek geometrician PYTHAGORAS, however, was not a typical
aneristic personality. He was what we call an EXPLODED ANERISTIC and an
AVATAR. We call him Archangle Pythagoras.

[diagram of HODGE/PODGE TRANSFORMER deleted... DtC]

5. Hung Mung slapped his buttocks, hopped about, and shook his head,
saying "I do not know! I do not know!"
        HBT; The Book of Gooks, Chap. 1
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
                               BRUNSWICK SHRINE

In the Los Angeles suburb of Whittier there lives a bowling alley, and
within this very place, in the Year of Our Lady of Discord 3125 (1959*),
Eris revealed Herself to The Golden Apple Corps for the first time.

In honor of this Incredible Event, this Holy Place is revered as a
Shrine by all Erisians. Once every five years, the Golden Apple Corps
plans a Pilgrimage to Brunswick Shrine as an act of Devotion, and
therein to partake of No Hot Dog Buns, and ruminate a bit about It All.

It is written that when The Corps returns to The Shrine for the fifth
time five times over, than shall the world come to an end:

                                IMPENDING DOOM
                                  HAS ARRIVED
        And Five Days Prior to This Occasion The Apostle The Elder
        Malaclypse Shall Walk the Streets of Whittier Bearing a Sign
        for All Literates to Read thereof: "DOOM", as a Warning of
        Forthcoming Doom to All Men Impending. And He Shall Signal 
        This Event by Seeking the Poor and Distributing to Them Precious
        MAO BUTTONS and Whittier Shall be Known as The Region of Thud
        for These Five Days.

As a public service to all mankind and civilization in general, and to
us in particular, the Golden Apple Corps has concluded that planning
such a Pilgrimage is sufficient and that it is prudent to never get
around to actually going.
___________________________________
* Or maybe it was 1958, I forget.

2945

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
 STARBUCK'S PEBBLES                                     Which
                                                          Is
                                                        Real?


                                *

                        *               *


                             *      *

Do these 5 pebbles [note: they were pebbles,originally..try doing
ASCII pebbles -DtC] REALLY form a pentagon?
Those biased by the Aneristic Illusion would say yes.
Those biased by the Eristic Illusion would say no. Criss-cross them and
it is a star.

An Illuminated Mind can see all of these, yet he does not insist that
any one is really true, or that none at all is true. Stars, and
pentagons, and disorder are all his creations and he may do with them as
he wishes. Indeed, even so the concept of number 5.

The real reality is there, but everything you KNOW about "it" is in your
mind and yours to do with as you like. Conceptualization is art, and YOU
ARE THE ARTIST.

Convictions cause convicts.

                                        
                                     Can you chart the COURSE
                                     to Captain Valentine's SWEETHEART?

Hemlock? I never touch the stuff!


                                When I was 8 or 9 years old, I acquired
                                a split beaver magazine. You can imagine
                                my disappointment when,upon examination
                                of the photos with a microscope, I found
                                that all I could see was dots.


7. Never write in pencil unless you are on a train or sick in bed.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様様
2946

ERIS CONTEMPLATES FOR 3125 YEARS
------------------------------------Pun-jab is Sikh, Sikh, Sikh!--------

THE PARATHEO-ANAMETAMYSTIKHOOD OF ERIS ESOTERIC (POEE)
A Non-prophet Irreligious Disorganization

                         MALACLYPSE THE YOUNGER, KSC
                Omnibenevolent Polyfather of Virginity in Gold
                                 HIGH PRIEST

THE ERISIAN MOVEMENT                                  HOUSE OF APOSTLES 
OF ERIS
(X) Official Business           ( )Surreptitious Business     page 1 of
1 pages
Official Discordian Document Number (if applicable): n/a
( ) the Golden Apple Corps  (X)House of Disciples of Discordia
                                The Bureaucracy, Bureau of:  DOGMAS
( ) Council of Episkoposes: Office of High Priesthood, Sect of the POEE 
( ) Drawer o
________________________________________________________________________
Today's DATE: day of the Carrot                 yesterday's DATE: Yes  
 -><-
Originating Cabal: Joshua Norton Cabal - San Francisco
TO: REV. RAMPANT PANCREAS, tRRoCR(a)pttM; Colorado Encrustation

Brother Ram,

Your acute observation that ERIS spelled backwards is SIRE, and your
inference to the effect that there is sexual symbolism here, have
brought me to some observations of my own,

ERIS spelled fore-part-aft-wards is RISE. And spelled inside out is
REIS, which is a unit of money, albeit Portugese-Brazilian and no longer
in use.  >From this it may be concluded that Eris has usurped Eros (god
of erotic love) in the eyes of those who read backwards; which obviously
made Eros sorE. Then She apparently embezzeled the Olympian Treasury and
went to Brazil; whereupon She opened a chain of whorehouses (which
certainly would get a rise from the male population). I figure it to be
this in particular because MADAM reads the same forwards and backwards.
And further, it is a term of great respect, similar to SIRE.

And so thank you for your insight, it may well be the clue to the
mystery of just where Eris has been fucking around for 3125.

                                FIVE TONS OF FLAX!
                                -><-    Mal-2

Not for Circulation!





          KALLISTI        HAIL ERIS             ALL HAIL DISCORDIA

safeguard this letter, it may be an important document 

                                Form No.: O.D.D. IIb/ii.1-37D.VVM:3134
2947

                     DOGMA III - HISTORY #2, "COSMOGONY"
which is not the same as DOGMA I - METAPHYSICS #2, "COSMOLOGY" (Book of
Uterus)

        In the beginning there was VOID, who had two daughters; one (the
smaller) was that of BEING, named ERIS, and one (the larger) was of
NON-BEING, named ANERIS. (To this day, the fundamental truth that Aneris
is the larger is apparent to all who compare the great number of things
that do not exist with the comparatively small number of things that do
exist.)

        Eris had been born pregnant, and after 55 years (Goddesses have
an unusually long gestation period-- longer even than elephants), Her
pregnancy bore the fruits of many things. These things were composed of
the Five Basic Elements, SWEET, BOOM, PUNGENT, PRICKLE, and ORANGE.
Aneris, however, had been created sterile. When she saw Eris enjoying
Herself so greatly with all of the existent things She had borne, Aneris
became jealous and finally one day she stole some existent things and
changed them into non-existent things and claimed them as her own
children. This deeply hurt Eris, who felt that Her sister was unjust
(being so much larger anyway) to deny Her her small joy. And so She made
herself swell again to bear more things. And She swore that no matter
how many of her begotten that Aneris would steal, She would beget more.
And, in return, Aneris swore that no matter how many existent things
Eris brought forth, she would eventually find them and turn them into
non-existent things for her own. (And to this day, things appear and
disappear in this very manner.) 

        At first, the things brought forth by Eris were in a state of
chaos and went in every which way, but by the by She began playing with
them andordered some of them just to see what would happen. Some pretty
things arosefrom this play and for the next five zillion years She
amused Herself bycreating order. And so She grouped some things with
others and some groups with others, and big groups with little groups,
and all combinations until She had many grand schemes which delighted
Her.

        Engrossed in establishing order, She finally one day noticed
disorder (previously not apparent because everything was chaos). There
were many ways in which chaos was ordered and many ways in which it was
not.

        "Hah," She thought, "Here shall be a new game."

        And She taught order and disorder to play with each other in
contest games, and to take turns amusing each other. She named the side
of disorder after Herself, "ERISTIC" because Being is anarchic. And
then, in a mood of sympathy for Her lonely sister, She named the other
side "ANERISTIC" which flattered Aneris and smoothed the friction a
little that was between them. 

        Now all of this time, Void was somewhat disturbed. He felt
unsatisfied for he had created only physical existence and physical
non-existence, and had neglected the spiritual. As he contemplated this,
a great Quiet was caused and he went into a state of Deep Sleep which
lasted for 5 eras. At the end of this ordeal, he begat a brother to Eris
and Aneris, that of SPIRITUALITY, who had no name at all.

2948

        When the sisters heard this, they both confronted Void and
pleaded that he not forget them, his First Born. And so Void decreed
thus:

        That this brother, having no form, was to reside with Aneris in
Non-Being and then to leave her and, so that he might play with order
and disorder, reside with Eris in Being. But Eris became filled with
sorrow when She heard this and then began to weep.

        "Why are you despondent?" demanded Void, "Your new brother will
have his share with you." "But Father, Aneris and I have been arguing,
and she will take him from me when she discovers him, and cause him to
return to Non-Being." "I see,"replied Void, "Then I decree the follow-
ing:

        "When your brother leaves the residence of Being, he shall not
reside again in Non-Being, but shall return to Me, Void, from whence he
came. You girls may bicker as you wish, but My son is your Brother and
We are all of Myself." 

And so it is that we, as men, do not exist until we do; and then it is
that we play with our world of existent things, and order and disorder
them, and so it shall be that non-existence shall take us back from
existence and that nameless spirituality shall return to Void, like a
tired child home from a very wild circus.

        "Everything is true - Everything is permissible!"           
-><-
                                                -Hassan i Sabbah

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
There is serenity in Chaos.
Seek ye the Eye of the Hurricane.


               A POEE MYSTEREE RITE - THE SRI SYADASTIAN CHANT
                       Written, in some sense, by Mal-2

Unlike a song, chants are not sung but chanted. This particular one is
much enhanced by the use of a Leader to chant the Sanskrit alone, with
all participants chanting the English. it also behooves one to be in a
quiet frame of mind and to be sitting in a still position, perhaps The
Buttercup Position. It also helps if one is absolutely zonked out of his
gourd.

RUB-A-DUB-DUB
O! Hail Eris. Blessed St. Hung Mung.
SYA-DASTI
O! Hail Eris. Blessed St. Mo-jo.
SYA-DAVAK-TAVYA
O! Hail Eris. Blessed St. Zara-thud.
SYA-DASTI SYA-NASTI
O! Hail Eris. Blessed St. Elder Mal.
SYA-DASTI KAVAK-TAV-YASKA
O! Hail Eris. Blessed St. Gu-lik.
SYA-DASTI, SYA-NASTI, SYA-DAVAK-TAV-YASKA
O! Hail Eris. All Hail Dis-cord-ia.
RUB-A-DUB-DUB
2949

It is then repeated indefinitely, or for the first two thousand miles,
which ever comes first.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The Classification of Saints

1. SAINT SECOND CLASS

To be reserved for all human beings deserving of Sainthood. Example:
St.Norton the First, Emperor of the United States and Protector of
Mexico (his grave near San Francisco is an official POEE shrine.)

THE FOLLOWING FOUR CATAGORIES ARE RESERVED FOR FICTIONAL BEINGS WHO, NOT
BEING ACTUAL, ARE MORE CAPABLE OF PERFECTION.

2. LANCE SAINT

Good Saint material and definitely inspiring.
Example: St. Yossarian (Catch 22, Heller)

3. LIEUTENANT SAINT

Excellent Goddess-Saturated Saint.
Example: St. Quixote (Don Quixote, Cervantes)

4. BRIGADIER SAINT

Comparable to Lt/Saint but has an established following (fictional or
factual). Example: St. Bokonon (Cat's Cradle, Vonnegut)

5. FIVE STAR SAINT

The Five Apostles of Eris.

Note: It is an Old Erisian Tradition to never agree with each other
about Saints.


Everybody understands Mickey Mouse. Few understand Herman Hesse. Only a
hand full understood Albert Einstein. And nobody understood Emperor
Norton.
                        -Slogan of NORTON CABAL - S.F.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
TESTS BY DOCTORS PROVE IT POSSIBLE TO SHRINK

    =ON OCCULTISM=

Magicians, especially since the Gnostic and the Quabala influences, have
sought higher consciousness through assimilation and control of
universal opposites-- good/evil, positive/negative, male/female, etc.
But due to the steadfast pomposity of ritualism inherited from the
ancient methods of the shaman, occultists have been blinded to what is
perhaps the two most important pairs of apparent or earth-plane
opposites: ORDER/DISORDER and SERIOUS/HUMOROUS.

Magicians, and progeny the scientists, have always taken themselves and
their subject in an orderly and sober manner, thereby disregarding an
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essential metaphysical balance. when magicians learn to approach
philosophy as a malleable art instead of an immutable Truth, and learn
to appreciate the absurdity of man's endeavours, then they will be able
to pursue their art with a lighter heart, and perhaps gain a clearer
understanding of it, and therefore gain more effective magic. CHAOS IS
ENERGY.

This is an essential challenge to the basic concepts of all western
occult thought, and POEE is humbly pleased to offer the first break-
through in occultism since Solomon.


"Study Demonology with an Enemy This Sunday"
                        sez Thom,Gnos

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
POEE ASTROLOGICAL SYSTEM

1) Om your next birthday, return to the place of your birth and, at
precisely midnight, noting your birth time and date of observation,
count all visible stars.

2) When you have done this, write to me and I'll tell you what to do
next.


The Eminent 16th Century Mathemetician Cardan so detested Luther that he
altered Luther's birthdate to give him an unfavorable horoscope.

The theorem to be proved is that if any even number of people take seats
at random around a circular table bearing place cards with their names,
it is always possible to rotate the table until at least two people are
opposite their cards. Assume the contrary. Let N be the even number of
persons, and let their names be replaced by the integers 0 to N-1 "in
such a way that the place cards are numbered in sequence around the
table. If a delegate D originally sits down to a place card P, then the
table must be rotated R steps before he is correctly seated, where
R=P-D, unless this is negative, in which case R=P-D+N. The collection of
values of D (and of P) for all delegates is clearly the integers 0 to
N-1,each taken once, but so also is the collection of values of R, or
else two delegates would be correctly seated at the same time.  Summing
the above equations, one for each delegate, gives S-S+NK, where K is an
integer and S=N(N-1)/2, the sum of the integers from 0 to N-1. It
follows that N=2K+1, an odd number." This contradicts the original
assumption.
        "I actually solved this problem some years ago," Rybicki writes,
"for a different but completely equivalent problem, a generalization of
the nonattacking 'eight queens' problem for a cylindrical chessboard
where diagonal attack is restricted to diagonals slanting in one
direction only.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
                        THE CURSE OF GREYFACE AND THE
                          INTRODUCTION OF NEGATIVISM

        To choose order over disorder, or disorder over order, is to
accept a trip composed of both the creative and the destructive. But to
choose the creative over the destructive is an all-creative trip
composed of both order and disorder. To accomplish this, one need only
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accept creative disorder along with, and equal to, creative order, and
also willing to reject destructive order as an undesirable equal to
destructive disorder.

        The Curse of Greyface included the division of life into
order/disorder as the essential positive/negative polarity, instead of
building a game foundation with creative/destructive as the essential
positive/negative. He has thereby caused man to endure the destructive
aspects of order and has prevented man from effectively participating in
the creative uses of disorder. Civilization reflects this unfortunate
division.

        POEE proclaims that the other division is preferable, and we
work toward the proposition that creative disorder, like creative order,
is possible and desirable; and that destructive order, like destructive
disorder, is unnecessary and undesirable.

        Seek the Sacred Chao - therein you will find the foolishness of
all ORDER/DISORDER. They are the same!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
                   ERISIAN MAGIC RITUAL - THE TURKEY CURSE

Revealed by the Apostle Dr. Van Van Mojo as a specific counter to the
evil Curse of Greyface, THE TURKEY CURSE is here passed on to Erisians
everywhere for their just protection.

The Turkey Curse works. It is firmly grounded on the fact that Greyface
and his followers absolutely require an aneristic setting to function
and that a timely introduction of eristic vibrations will neutralize
their foundation.  The Turkey Curse is designed solely to counteract
negative aneristic vibes and if introduced into a neutral or positive
aneristic setting (like a poet working out word rhythms) it will prove
harmless, or at worst, simply annoying. It is not designed for use
against negative eristic vibes, although it can be used as an eristic
vehicle to introduce positive vibes into a misguided eristic setting. In
this instance, it would be the responsibility of the Erisian Magician to
manufacture the positive vibrations if results are to be achieved.
CAUTION- all magic is powerful and requires courage and integrity on the
part of the magician. This ritual, if misused, can backfire. Positive
motivation is essential for self-protection.

TO PERFORM THE TURKEY CURSE:

Take a foot stance as if you were John L. Sullivan preparing for fis-
ticuffs.  Face the particular greyfaced you wish to short-circuit, or
towards the direction of the negative aneristic vibration that you wish
to neutralize.  Begin waving your arms in any elaborate manner and make
motions with your hands as though you were Mandrake feeling up a sexy
giantess. Chant, loudly and clearly:
                   GOBBLE, GOBBLE, GOBBLE, GOBBLE, GOBBLE!
The results will be instantly apparent.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~




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                A PRIMER FOR ERISIAN EVANGELISTS by Lord Omar

        The SOCRATIC APPROACH is most successful when confronting the
ignorant. The "socratic approach" is what you call starting an argument
by asking questions. You approach the innocent and simply ask "Did you
know that God's name is ERIS, and that He is a girl?" If he should
answer "Yes." then he probably is a fellow Erisian and so you can forget
it. If he says "No." then quickly proceed to:
        THE BLIND ASSERTION and say "Well, He Is a girl, and His name is
ERIS!" Shrewedly observe if the subject is convinced. If he is, swear
him into the Legion of Dynamic Discord before he changes his mind. If he
does not appear convinced, then proceed to:
        THE FAITH BIT: "But you must have Faith! All is lost without
Faith! I sure feel sorry for you if you don't have Faith." And then add:
        THE ARGUMENT BY FEAR and in an ominous voice ask "Do you know
what happens to those who deny Goddess?" If he hesitates, don't tell him
that he will surely be reincarnated as a precious Mao Button and
distributed to the poor in the Region of Thud (which would be a mean
thing to say), just shake your head sadly and, while wiping a tear from
your eye, go to:
        THE FIRST CLAUSE PLOY wherein you point to all of the discord
and confusion in the world and exclaim "Well who the hell do you think
did all of this, wise guy?" If he says, "Nobody, just impersonal
forces." then quickly respond with:
        THE ARGUMENT BY SEMANTICAL GYMNASTICS and say that he is
absolutely right, and that those impersonal forces are female and that
Her name is ERIS.  If he, wonder of wonders, still remains obstinate,
then finally resort to:
        THE FIGURATIVE SYMBOLISM DODGE and confide that sophisticated
people like himself recognize that Eris is a Figurative Symbol for an
Ineffable Metaphysical Reality and that The Erisian Movement is really
more like a poem than like a science and that he is liable to be turned
into a Precious Mao Button and Distributed to The Poor in The Region of
Thud if he does not get hip. Then put him on your mailing list.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
SINK

A GAME

by Ala Hera, E.L., N.S.; RAYVILLE APPLE PANTHERS

SINK is played by Discordians and people of much ilk.

PURPOSE: To sink object or an object or a thing...
in water or mud or anything you; can sink something in.

R